My legs shake, and I realize that maybe it isn’t the cold air making me shiver. Maybe it’s the heaviness of the reality of our ending finally hitting me. “My entire world is that cafe, Camden.” My voice quakes, but I keep talking because I don’t care if he sees me break down. “It’s all I’ve ever wanted. Everything I’ve worked hard for.”
Tears pour down my face. He tries to reach out and wipe them away, but I turn my head to avoid him. “My mom helped me pick out everything there. We spent hours at the hardware store, selecting the perfect shade of pink. She helped me design a logo and went to countless thrift stores with me to help decorate the place. I walk into that building every morning and feel her with me. She’s everywhere in it. And some rich asshole in a suit wants to take that from me.” My head rocks back and forth as my eyes close. I can’t see anything through the tears. “I can’t lose this one thing I still have of hers.”
He tentatively grabs my chin. When he tries to coax it up, I fight him, not wanting to look at him. He sighs, not forcing my head up, even though I know he wants to.
“I told you I’ll fix it. I stick to my word. You won’t lose it, baby. Let me fix this for you.”
I let out a shaky breath. “You wouldn’t have to fix it if you hadn’t tried to fix Sutten in the first place.” I know my words are harsh, that he doesn’t deserve them, but there’s an irrational part of me that thinks they’re true. If he hadn’t tried making Sutten something it wasn’t, then businessmen like Jason wouldn’t have ever threatened everything I’ve worked for.
“I never could’ve imagined he’d do this.” His voice catches with emotion. “You have to believe me on that.”
I finally look at him. I can’t help myself, and I regret it the moment our eyes connect. Because I know he means that, and I hate myself for ever even having the thought to blame him for this. It isn’t his fault, but I’m lost and scared, and I hate that I’m lashing out at him.
“I need to go back to Sutten,” I tell him, my voice quaking.
“We’ll go together.”
I shake my head. “I think I should go home alone.”
54
CAMDEN
It feels like my heart is being ripped in half. Pippa looks up at me with a blank expression. There used to be light—and maybe even love—in her eyes when her eyes met mine. Now, there’s nothing but tears. I want to rip apart the world after seeing her like this, seeing her so upset.
“You don’t have to do this alone,” I tell her, wiping a tear from her cheek. There’s no use doing it; seconds after I’ve wiped it away, another one follows suit.
“What are we doing here?” Pippa asks. Even her voice is void of emotion. She’s pulling away from me. I can feel it, and I don’t know what to do. I’ve never had to fight for someone. I’ve never cared about someone enough to be in this position.
“We’re here because I wanted to show you my world. I’ve seen so much of yours in Sutten, I just wanted to have you here and show you off to everyone. But we can go back home if you want. I’ll just—”
Pippa places a hand to my chest. “No, not here physically. But here in general.” Her eyes look to the building next to us. “I wanted to love this part of your life, Camden. I really did. But this isn’t me. I don’t want this, and I’ll never fit into this life.”
My heart hammers inside my chest from the panic of losing her. “Until Jason, I thought you were having fun.”
She lets out a sad laugh. “Did you know when I was looking for you, I overheard these women talking about you? I think one of them was someone you used to see. They were also talking about me. About how I don’t belong. About how we don’t belong together and that there’s no reason you’d bring me here unless you were using me.”
My pulse hammers through my ears with rage. I tighten my jaw, trying to fight the anger coursing through my veins. “You don’t think I’m using you, do you?”
She shakes her head. “No. I don’t think you’re using me.” I feel the smallest moment of relief until she keeps talking. “But it made me think they might have a point. We don’t work, Camden. Our lives are different. Too different. No part of me wants to fit in here. Not when women talk nasty about each other behind their backs and men with money purchase businesses with the intent to drive out the good people who have worked their asses off to be there. I don’t want to fit in here, and you don’t want to fit in in Sutten.” She takes another breath. “So what are we doing here?”