“What are you nervous about?”
“I guess just thinking about being the one responsible for diagnosing and making the treatment plan…it’s a lot of responsibility. What if I miss something? What if someone gets hurt because I make a mistake?”
“That won’t happen.”
“It absolutely could happen. I’m human.”
Yeah, okay. “Fine, it could happen. But it probably won’t, because you’re damn good at what you do. You’re smart, you’re talented, and you listen to people. You care too much to skip over things and when you take care of someone, you make sure every angle is covered.” He put a hand to his chest. “I should know.”
The muscles in her forehead seemed to relax marginally.
“The fact that you’re worried about it means you’re going to be the best there is. You’re compassionate and those patients mean something to you. I know you won’t let them down. Plus, you’re not alone in it. You’ll still have doctors and all those nurses you work with, too, right? You’re a team. It’s not just on you, so slide some of that burden off your shoulders. I’m not running into a building on fire without my crew with me and a plan in place about how we’re gonna tackle it together. But even then, I know we’ll figure it out because we’ve trained for that moment. You have years of nursing experience under your belt, plus NP school on top of that. You’ve got all the tools you need to be the best one that hospital has ever seen. You’re ready, Claire.”
Cheeks flushed, she blinked at him for a moment, then dipped her chin. “Well.”
He cocked his head. “Well, what?”
“That was…really nice. Quite a pep talk.”
“It’s easy when I believe every word. You think I’d have let just anyone else fix this gorgeous face?”
She rolled her eyes, still smiling. “I barely had to do anything.”
“I see you didn’t refute the gorgeous part.”
“Obviously.”
He grinned, wanting to kiss her, but settled for sliding his calf along hers under the table.
She arched a brow but didn’t move her leg. “Anyway, what about you? What do you want to be remembered for?”
“Whether I want it to be or not, I figured mine would be for being adventurous. Or reckless. Could go either way.”
She huffed out a single laugh. “Yeah. You’ll be remembered for being an adrenaline junkie, no question.”
He thought he detected a hint of something off in her tone, but she gave him a warm smile and he decided to leave it be.
Tonight was ending up damn near perfect, and he didn’t plan on doing anything to mess it up.
From: [email protected]
Subject: Four letter words part 2
Claire,
I’m writing this from my phone while you sleep beside me. We’re at my parents’ house and I just had the best night of my life. I tried to show you when we got back how much you mean to me, and I hope you felt it. I hope you know. I’m sorry I couldn’t speak the words out loud, but I have to say them somewhere. So here goes:
You. Are. Extraordinary.
You’re an insanely beautiful, sassy, sometimes crass woman who takes no shit and isn’t afraid to ask for what she wants. You’ve experienced tragedy in the worst way and yet you emerged strong and resilient. You refused to let your past steal your ability to laugh.
Your laugh is the most incredible sound, did you know that?
You have the most unbelievable eyes. I’ve never seen a color like that. And when they flash with…what word did you say you feel when you’re with me? Hostility? That look wrecks me. I want to laugh, cry, and take you in my arms all at the same time. I lose all fucking control, Claire.
You’ve dedicated your life to healing people. You love trying new things, seeing new places, and you dance like no one’s watching. You’re a romantic but don’t want anyone to know.
I know. I see you.
And I’ve fallen in love with you.
You make me feel things I usually only feel when I’m looking death in the face. I told you a while back that I spend so much time outdoors because I want to experience everything life has to offer, but this weekend I’m realizing I’m missing one key experience—true human connection and the joy that comes with letting yourself be completely vulnerable with someone.
People talk about reasons they fall in love and get married—things like physical attraction （check）， enjoying each other’s company （check）， respect for one another （check）， and having similar interests （check…sort of）。 But another one is opening up to share their lives with each other—wholly and completely—and I wasn’t sure that piece was ever possible for me. It’s the main reason I’ve kept that word out of my vocabulary for so long.