Mars snatches the blankets as Jake and Rachel laugh. “It’s my bed,” he barks.
“God, I’m not getting under there with you naked,” I huff.
“Good.”
I snatch the little knit throw blanket off the end of the bed and use that to cover my legs as I take up the spot next to Mars on top of the covers. “Where’s Caleb?” I say, glancing around.
“He wanders in and out,” Rachel says with another yawn.
“How did you even get in here?” Mars asks.
“I used my key,” I reply setting my coffee down on the side table.
“And how did you get a key?”
“Because I gave it to her, remember?” Rachel replies, her hand reaching out to pet his hair too.
He scoots closer to her. “How did she disable the alarm—”
“Oh my god, officer, I confess, alright?” I say, throwing up both hands in mock surrender. “I broke in through a window, ducked the net of laser beams, and disabled the alarm by cutting the blue wire.”
“Hey, I’ve seen that movie,” Jake teases.
“What the hell is going on in here?”
We all turn to see a very naked Caleb standing in the doorway.
“God,” I cry, my hand going up to cover my eyes. “Do none of you have clothes?”
He saunters up to the other side of the bed, leaning down to kiss Jake, then across him to kiss Rachel. “What is Tess doing here at 6:30 a.m.?”
“Girl gossip,” Jake replies as Rachel says, “Vagina monologues.”
Jake tosses him a pillow and he casually holds it in front of his naked lower half. “I need to get ready for work,” he says at his partners.
“Mars and I don’t need to be in until nine,” Jake replies.
“I’m going in at eight,” Rachel adds.
“That doesn’t mean I need to suck my own dick in there, does it?” Caleb replies, gesturing to the bathroom.
Rachel just sighs. “Seriously, Cay?” At the same time, I cry, “God, I’m sitting right here.”
“Well, I’m interested,” Jake says, his tone brightening. “But…” He glances dramatically from me back to Caleb.
“I’m sure Tess won’t mind if I fuck my husband in my own shower, in my own house, behind a closed door,” Caleb replies with a roll of his eyes.
“No, I’m interested in her vagina monologue,” Jake admits.
Rachel laughs and it’s my turn to roll my eyes. “You can feel free to leave at any time,” I say at them both. “I really only need Rachel here to witness my humiliation.”
“Well, now I’m definitely not leaving,” Jake replies, tugging Caleb down onto the bed next to him.
“I have to get ready,” Caleb huffs at him.
“Five minutes, and then we’ll do a speed round,” Jake tosses out as a compromise. “Tess, you’ve got five minutes. Go.”
Rachel, Jake, and Cay all look to me.
“I—can’t—Rach, I need to know how well you know Shelby,” I get out at last.
“Pretty well, I guess,” she says with a shrug. Then she flashes me a look of horror. “Wait—ohmygod, what did you do?”
“What?” I cry, feigning indignation.
“You only do morning freak outs when you’re regretting last night. I know you fucked someone inappropriate, and now you’re asking me about Shelby and—oh, holy fuck, was it Sully?”
“No,” Jake gasps dramatically, his hand going over his mouth.
Rachel looks ready to implode. “Tess, I swear to God—”
“Ew, gross,” I shout over her. “No! He’s like obnoxiously happily married and he wears socks with sandals. Are you kidding me?”
“Hey, I wear socks with sandals,” Jake counters.
“We all do,” Caleb adds.
“If you need a reason to hate him, how about because his favorite ice cream flavor is Rocky Road?” Jake offers. “I mean, honestly, it’s criminal.”
But Rachel is looking at me. “If not Sully, then who did you—”
“She fucked Langers,” Caleb says, his eyes on Jake’s phone.
It’s my turn to gasp, peering around the other two at him. “How did you know?”
“Because your mutual attraction is as subtle as a goal horn,” Ilmari says next to me, his face still buried in the pillows by Rachel’s side. He’s shifted a little so now he has a large arm slung over her hips.