“Yeah, we’ll hardly even get the chance to miss you,” Morrow adds, the relief etched on his face. “The rookies will be at your beck and call. And you know the WAGs will fix you up with enough meals to last you through the rest of the season. It’ll be like a vacation—”
“Wait, doesn’t your place have like a shit ton of stairs?” says Sully.
I just shrug. “I mean, yeah. But I’ve managed on crutches before. It’s really not a big deal.”
“Dude, that dump you rent is a split-level,” adds Jake. “There are stairs fucking everywhere. It’s a death trap. You’re not staying there.”
“Guys, I’m fine. Four weeks, remember? And nothing’s even broken—”
“Maybe a rookie can just take him in?” Sully says over me at Jake. “Walsh?”
“Walsh rents a one-room apartment and has a live-in girlfriend,” I reply.
“Perry, then,” Jake offers.
“Or Dave-O,” counters Sully.
“Surely times aren’t that desperate,” says Morrow with a scoff. Then he sighs, shaking his head. “I mean…I guess you could stay with me. It’s only four weeks, right?”
Both Sully and Jake turn to him with matching frowns.
“Wow. Heartfelt,” Jake deadpans.
“Yeah, you had about as much enthusiasm as if you just offered to let him jizz in your shampoo bottle,” says Sully.
I snort a laugh. “Thanks, but no thanks, Coley. I can only guess what kind of weirdness you and Novy get up to over there.”
“Nov is moving out,” he mutters, crossing his arms.
We all turn to him.
“Wait—what happened?” says Jake, eyes wide. “Did you guys break up?”
Sully chokes on a laugh.
“Shut up, asshole,” Morrow snaps. “It’s none of your business.”
“Wait…did you?” Sully presses. “Like…are you two secretly a thing?”
“No way,” Jake cries. “Hey, Cay and I aren’t the only ones.” He raises a hand like he’s seeking a high five, but Morrow just groans.
“It’s not like that, assholes. It was always meant to be temporary. You know, while they did the renos on his house,” he adds with a shrug.
Novy bought a big bachelor pad of a beach house a few blocks down the street from Jake. They both have multi-year contracts with no-trade clauses. They can afford to put down roots and invest in things like kitchen renovations.
We all wait for Morrow to say more but he just glares. “It’s just—look, this is about Langley’s problem.” He gestures back at me lying in the hospital bed. “He’s the one who needs a place to stay.”
“Oh god,” Jake laughs, smacking his forehead. “I’m such an idiot.”
“What?” asks Sully.
Jake looks to me. “I’ve got the perfect place you can stay. Furnished, close to the practice arena, and not a single stair.”
“Where?” I say.
He slips his hand into his pocket and takes out his keys, working one off the ring. “Here, man.”
I shift forward, taking the silver key from his hand. “What’s this?”
“Key to Mars’s house,” he replies.
The three of us stare down at the key like it’s a rare, unearthed treasure.
“I’ve never been to Mars’s house,” Morrow says, his tone almost reverent.
“Me either,” says Sully. “I don’t even know where it is. How do you have that?” he adds, eyes wide as he takes in Jake, like he’s suddenly recalculating him and his potential.
Jake just laughs, then frowns. “Wait—are you assholes serious?” When none of us respond, he huffs again. “We got married, remember? In L.A.? You were all fucking there?”
“But…I thought it was like a ‘Doc in the middle’ kind of thing,” Morrow says.
“Yeah, we didn’t know you had a key to his place for…you know, just like…just you,” Sully adds.
Jake scoffs. “You guys really need to brush up on your polyamory. I’m not fucking Mars, alright? And he’s not fucking me,” he adds, pointing a finger at Morrow who swallows his retort. “He’s my metaphor.”
Sully and I share a quick glance. “Your what?” I say.
“My metaphor,” Jake repeats. “It’s a polyam term.”
“I really don’t think it is,” Sully says, trying to contain his smile.