“That’s so good,” he says with a quiet groan.
He reaches around, sliding his hand inside my thong from the front.
The orgasm hits me so fast I can barely warn him. “I’m coming,” I whisper. “Cover my mouth.”
He does it not a moment too soon, because there is no stopping the noises I’m making right now.
“God, that’s hot,” he groans, and his body behind me draws tight and tense as he finishes, muffling his final gasps against my shoulder.
It’s over too quickly. I need more than a few minutes in his office after a week apart. I need to lie on his chest and hear about his week and have him convince me that we’re going to be okay in that way of his…The way in which he never actually says the words.
“When are we seeing you again?” I ask, fixing my skirt while he zips up his pants.
He doesn’t entirely meet my eye. “I fly out in the morning, and I’ve got a lot of shit to deal with here, but I’ll try to get home before the twins go to bed.”
I kiss him goodbye, guilty and dissatisfied at once. I don’t want to add to his plate. But I also don’t like feeling as if I’m begging for scraps.
I take the twins to the beach that evening with my stomach in knots. A part of me is dying to tell Henry that Caleb’s home simply to watch his face light up, but…I don’t actually believe it’s going to work out. Caleb has the very best of intentions, but of a long list of priorities…we are last.
The twins are already in bed by the time he calls, and I guess I suspected it would work out like this.
“I’m sorry,” he says. “Everything ran late and we’re still working. I’m probably going to work through the night and head straight to the airport. I hope Henry wasn’t counting on it.”
“No.” Because I didn’t tell him. Because I didn’t quite count on you myself. “Have a good trip. Don’t forget about next Thursday.”
“Thursday?” he asks, distracted. The noise of the crowd around him gets louder.
“He’s showing the class the robotic arm?”
“Right,” he says. “Sorry. It’s on my calendar—I swear. Nothing will stop me from being there.”
I wish I believed that.
ON WEDNESDAY AFTERNOON, I’m showered and ready to see Caleb long before his flight lands. Molly’s going to watch the twins so I can sneak next door for our first overnight since we went to the hotel. I bought the black lace garter thing as a surprise—when you’ve only had quickies for the past month, it warrants a small celebration.
He calls just as we’re sitting down to dinner.
“I’ve got some bad news,” he says, and my teeth clench. It feels like he does nothing but call with bad news of late.
I walk toward the front of the house so the twins won’t overhear. “Is your flight delayed?”
He sighs. “I wish that’s all it was. The COO got held up, so we’re getting together tomorrow instead.”
The disappointment swings into me hard, like an unexpected door. But…you promised. Henry was counting on it. This is the kind of thing Jeremy would do, but you were supposed to be different.
Except he never promised he’d be different. He never said he’d work less. I just wanted to believe he would, given the right circumstances. I wanted to believe that when it really mattered, he’d put us first.
“You can’t meet with him by video?” I ask, though I already know it’s too late.
“Lucie, that’s not how a meeting like this takes place. I’m trying to woo these guys. We’re having lunch, and I’ll catch the five o’clock flight back.”
Unless the meeting goes long. Unless the COO decides you should discuss it over drinks instead. “Well, I’d better let Henry know,” I say.
“I really am sorry, Lucie, but this meeting—”
“Stop,” I snap. “When you say but in a sentence, you invalidate all the words you said before it. So please don’t.”
He sighs again. “I knew this was going to be a problem. I knew my job was going to be an issue eventually.”
I can’t believe he’s using this moment to scold me about my expectations. Jeremy’s words ring in my head, though I wish they wouldn’t: you think I was a disappointment as a father? Wait until you’re depending on someone who isn’t even related to them. “What an excellent time to say I told you so, Caleb. Anything else you want to add before I go talk to Henry?”