“I know.” Her words were a harsh whisper. “That doesn’t mean I don’t hate myself every single day.”
The urge to pull her into my arms was so strong I had to beat it back with everything I had. “I don’t think your sister would want that.”
A tremulous smile spread across Aspen’s face. “She wouldn’t. She was such a good sister.”
An ache took root in my chest, digging in deep. “I’m sorry you lost her. I’m glad that fucker’s in prison.”
Something passed over Aspen’s face. Something that had unease sliding through me.
“What?”
She shook her head. “Not everyone believes he belongs there.”
I remembered that about the news coverage. Charming doctor. Good-looking. Rich. Involved in charity work. No one wanted to believe he would kill his wife in cold blood. Even with Aspen’s testimony, people thought she’d gotten it wrong. That trauma had confused her, or even that she was outright lying.
“That’s why you changed your name?”
Aspen worried the spot on the inside of her cheek. “People found out where I lived, where I worked. I got jumped by two guys outside my office building downtown because an asshole reporter printed where I worked. Ended up with broken ribs and a concussion.”
Fury lit my veins so fast and fierce that it was all I could do to keep breathing.
“I hit my breaking point when someone tried to take Cady from daycare, saying I didn’t deserve her. After that, I knew it was only a matter of time before one of us got seriously hurt.”
My fingers spasmed around Aspen’s as blood roared in my ears.
“A cop helped me. Walked us through the channels to get new, sealed identities. We were supposed to be safe.”
My spine jerked straight. “You are safe. And we’re going to make sure you stay that way.”
Aspen shook her head, her red locks catching the light. “I don’t have a choice now. They’ll tell everyone where I am. It doesn’t matter how much I want to stay. I have to disappear again.”
14
ASPEN
I was already mentally making my list. Roan could take me to get my car. I’d just have to make do with whatever Jim had done on it so far. Then I’d need to pack up here. Find someone to care for the animals. I could get Maddie for that.
“You’re not going anywhere.”
My head jerked up at Roan’s voice. It was hard and brooked no argument. “I don’t want to. But I don’t have a choice.”
A muscle in his jaw ticked. “Of course, you do.”
“They’re going to publish that podcast. And even if they don’t…if they found me, others can, too.” I shivered at the thought that someone already had. John. It was on the tip of my tongue to tell Roan about the letter, but I’d already shared too much.
“Leaving is the worst thing you could do.”
I jerked my hand from his. The loss of the contact burned, but I shoved that down. “It’s smart. It’s taking care of myself and Cady.”
“You’ll be out there alone. You have no idea how they tracked you. They could do it again. Here, you have backup. People who care.”
My throat constricted. The thought of leaving Wren, Maddie, and the whole Hartley clan had me struggling to breathe. For the first time since losing Autumn, I had people looking out for me. I’d be leaving that behind.
Roan pressed on. “If you leave, you won’t have anyone looking out for you. For Cady.”
That was the killing blow right there. When Autumn asked me to be Cady’s godmother, I’d sworn to protect her with everything I had.
“I don’t know how to keep us safe,” I admitted in a whisper.
“You let me help. Let Lawson help.”
Everything ached, the feeling of that bit of anonymity I had slipping away. “I don’t want anyone to know.”
My hand slipped under my shirt, finding the raised skin. People looked at you differently when they knew. They either pitied you or blamed you.
Roan’s jaw worked. “Just me and Law. I want him to give those assholes an official warning.”
It was better if Lawson knew. I understood that, but it still hurt. “Okay.”
Roan studied me for a moment. “You’ll stay?”
It might end up being a mistake, but I nodded. “I’ll stay.”
Maddie glanced over at me as we drove into town. “Are you okay? You seem jumpy.”
I winced. Apparently, I hadn’t been circumspect in my search for the silver van as we drove. I kept expecting the two podcasters to jump out and give me away at any moment.