But they just kept walking. “This place was kept out of the way,” Cairis said. “Maybe he kept the good shit down—what?”
My short-lived breath of relief stilled.
One set of footsteps—Raihn’s—had stopped.
“What is it?” Cairis said, again.
“Nothing. Just curiosity.”
Raihn was a good actor. He always sold his lies well.
“You go ahead,” he said to Cairis. “I’d like to look around in here instead first.”
Fuck. Fuck.
“You want me to call someone to help you?”
“Honestly, I’m dying for a little privacy. Want to hear myself think for once.”
Cairis chuckled, and I glanced frantically around the office. The only hiding place was under the desk. A comically terrible choice. Still, it was better than nothing.
As I ducked down beneath the desk, I caught one final glimpse of all my father’s work—papers and diagrams that showed exactly how much he loved his kingdom, and how much of his blood and sweat he poured into building and protecting his empire.
His empire. My empire.
And here I was cowering under a fucking desk.
A sudden, agonizing wave of shame swallowed me as I slid beneath the wood.
Just as one set of footsteps faded away, and the other drew closer.
Just as the door swung open and a familiar voice said, “Did you really think I wouldn’t smell you, princess?”
6
ORAYA
Fuck.
I looked around for something, anything, I could use as a weapon. That would be too easy, apparently.
“Are you going to come out from under that,” Raihn asked, “or are you going to make me get you?”
My jaw clenched so hard it shook.
Suddenly I felt just like I had in the Moon Palace, when he had taunted me in the greenhouse. I was cornered then, and I was cornered now.
I rose and turned to face him. My hands curled at my sides. I wished I didn’t see the flicker of disappointment in Raihn’s eyes at my concession.
He leaned against the doorframe, surveying me, that brief reveal disappearing beneath the smirk at his mouth, his performance reassumed.
I said nothing.
“I know you’re very good at sneaking around places you aren’t supposed to be,” he went on. “Should I feel lucky you don’t have your blades on you this time?”
He touched his thigh, calling back the first time we had met—when he’d grabbed me in an attempt to save my life, and I’d thanked him for it by driving my dagger into his leg.
What did he think he was doing here? Playing with me like nothing had changed between us. Like we were still just two contestants in the Kejari, reluctant allies.
My voice was hard and sharp. “Somewhere I’m not supposed to be? This is my home.”
I was never very good at seeming cold and collected when my emotions were thrashing under the surface of my skin. Vincent had reminded me of it often.
Raihn saw the truth.
His smirk disappeared.
“I know that,” he said. No hint of teasing this time.
“No, you don’t,” I shot back. “You don’t understand that because you’re keeping me a prisoner here.”
“You’re not a prisoner. You’re—”
You’re my queen, he always said.
Bullshit. I couldn’t stand it anymore.
“Stop,” I snapped. “Just—just STOP. Stop with the lies. Stop with the willful ignorance. You lock me in my room every night. You sleep in the next apartment so you can guard me—”
Raihn moved abruptly—two steps forward so he was up against the other side of the desk, leaning close to me.
“I am trying to keep you alive, Oraya,” he said, voice low. “And it’s hard fucking work, alright? I know none of it is ideal. But I’m trying.”
I wanted to say, So what? Let it happen, if it’s so hard to stop it. Let them kill me.
You’re better than that, little serpent, Vincent whispered in my ear.
“How benevolent of you,” I shot back. “How selfless.”
Raihn’s palms now pressed to the table, and he looked directly into my eyes.
“Do you think I want any of this?” he spat. “Do you think I want to listen to you sob every night?”
The blood drained from my face.
At my expression, his mouth thinned. I could practically hear him silently scolding himself for saying it.
I knew there was a possibility that he heard me. I knew that Raihn had always seen everything I didn’t want him to. But fuck, to hear it acknowledged—it violated some unspoken contract. My cheeks warmed.