Falling Like Leaves (Bramble Falls, #1)(81)
“Yeah, I screwed up.”
“Whatever happened between the two of you is your business, though. Don’t forget that when people are prying and taking sides.”
“Ugh, this week is going to suck, isn’t it?”
“It’s a small town, so yeah, it really is. I’m sorry. But it’ll blow over.” She stands. “I’m meeting Asher so we can go shopping for a witch costume for the parade. Do you want to come? It was your brilliant idea….”
“No, I think I’ll stay here and wallow. But thank you for still doing that.”
“Of course. It’s my dream role,” she says with a grin.
As my cousin leaves to prepare for next weekend’s parade, my eyes snag on a half-finished dress concept hanging alone on the curtain rod. I take one more bite of my Pop-Tart before I throw my blanket off, pull out the box of plaid shirts, and start sewing.
Because it’s the only thing that can bring me an inkling of joy amid all the heartbreak.
* * *
I spend the rest of the week hidden in my room when I’m not at school. Word about me messing everything up got around to everyone in town quickly. I can’t even get a coffee or walk down the sidewalk without people looking at me like I broke the thing dearest to them.
Because I did. Again.
Only this time, I had all the information—I knew how Cooper felt, and I knew he was scared I’d ditch him again. This time, he begged me not to go. He wanted to work through what was happening together. But I did it, anyway. I broke him anyway.
I don’t blame anyone for hating me.
In a U-shaped hallway, it’s nearly impossible to avoid Cooper, but I keep my eyes down. In class, I give him space. I don’t look his way, but I know he’s moved to the back of the room with Chloe, where he used to sit when he was avoiding me.
I haven’t fixed my hair. I haven’t put on makeup. I haven’t slept, and I can’t eat. I’m a walking breakup song, and I don’t even care.
I’m at my locker on Friday, getting my books to take to the library for lunch period, when Jake stops and leans on the locker next to mine.
“Hey…,” I say. We haven’t spoken at all this week, and I don’t know what to say to anyone at this point. I moved seats so I’m not sitting by him in class anymore. If people feel like they have to choose sides, I know they’re on Cooper’s. I didn’t want to make him feel weird or guilty about that.
“You look like shit,” he says.
I lift my eyebrows in surprise. “That… is true. But it’s still a really mean thing to say to me.”
“Sorry. I’m just saying, you look like shit. Cooper looks like shit. Can’t you two just look like shit together?”
“No.” I close my locker. “He would very much like to look like shit as far away from me as possible.”
“He’s being an idiot.”
“No, he’s not. I shouldn’t have left him like that.”
“No, you shouldn’t have, but you were upset,” he says.
“I hurt him.”
“Okay, but you’re here now,” he says, “and from what I hear, you’re staying.”
Am I? I still don’t have a plan. At the moment, I’m just trying to survive my whole world crumbling.
“It doesn’t matter. He hates me.”
Jake sighs, exasperated. “He loves you, Ellis. He’s loved you since he was fourteen.”
Tears prick my eyes instantly. I should have told him I loved him the second I felt it. Instead I threw it all away.
I can’t respond—not that I even know what to say—because if I try, I’ll cry right here in the Bramble Falls High hallway. Jake must see it on my face because he pulls me into a hug.
“You two will get through this,” he says quietly.
I nod even though I know that ship has sailed. “You better get to lunch before someone sees you fraternizing with the most hated person in town.”
He lets go of me. “Fuck that. I’m going to the library with you.”
“Um, why?”
He shrugs. “Because you’re my friend.”
A tear escapes the corner of my eye. I hurry and wipe it away. “Stop making me cry, asshole.”
Jake laughs. “Sorry.” He takes my books and carries them for me as we head toward the library. “On the bright side, if things don’t work out with you and Cooper, you’re in luck because no one else has scooped me up yet. I might consider giving you a second chance.”
For the first time in a week, a laugh flies out of me.
I link arms with him. “Too soon, Jakey. Too soon.”
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Aunt Naomi’s house is chaos after school. Stressed voices stream from the kitchen, battling for attention as they all yell something about a budget. I peek my head in and recognize enough of them—including Cooper’s mom—to know it’s the tourism board. And if they’re all here instead of at town hall, then it must be an emergency meeting.
Luckily, no one spots me, so I sneak upstairs. As I pass Mom’s bedroom, classical music fills the hallway. I don’t think I’ll ever be ready for the conversation I need to have with her, but continuing to put it off isn’t going to help me get back what I had last week. If I want to fix our relationship, I have to talk to her.