I’M YOUR BROTHER
JOEY
“Where is he?” I asked the moment my girlfriend was gone, as a million thoughts were rushing around in my mind. While my heart was demanding answers to even more questions, only one question stood out in my hazy thoughts. “Where’s Dad?”
“The Gards haven’t been able to find him.”
Of course they hadn’t.
The old man wouldn’t resurface until the time was right.
He was as sharp as a tack.
He knew how to play the system better than anyone.
I didn’t want Molloy to have to hear any of this. I didn’t want that man tainting her life any more than he already had.
“They’ll find him, Joey,” Darren continued to say. To fucking lie. “The Gards are scouring the countryside looking for him. He won’t get away with it. Not this time.”
“Not this time,” I repeated his words slowly, gaze flicking from Darren to Mam. “What makes you think this time is different?”
All along they had been in contact with each other.
Never once in the past five and a half years had he attempted to reach out to me.
When I thought about Shannon and how my disappearing for five years would affect her, I physically recoiled.
I could never do it.
I could never leave them like that.
Knowing that he could and did made me so fucking resentful that I was practically choking on my hatred.
I knew he had to get out, we all did, but it didn’t change how it all rolled out.
Now he was here, acting like the fucking savior of all things Lynch, and I despised him for it.
“Because Mam is ready to leave him.” Darren’s tone was laced with sincerity, which assured me that he truly believed the shit he was spurting. “This time she’s really ready, Joe.”
“She’s not ready,” I replied flatly, ignoring the way my mother nodded eagerly like a loyal dog. “She won’t leave him until she’s in a box and you’re a fool if you believe otherwise.”
“That’s not true, Joey,” she tried to coax, closing the space between us and taking the spot my girlfriend had vacated. “I’ve been to the court. There was an emergency hearing. I’ve been granted a safety order.”
Words.
They were just words.
I’d heard them all a million times before.
They meant as little now as any other time.
Promises made, promises broken.
It was bullshit.
“And you?” I turned my attention to the turncoat bastard I hadn’t laid eyes on since puberty hit me. “What’s your angle?”
Darren’s brows furrowed. “My angle?”
“What do you want?” I asked, tone void of all emotion. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m back to help,” he said, roughly clearing his throat. “I came home for my family, Joe.”
“Your family.”
“Yeah, my family.” Tears filled his eyes. “I missed you so much, kid.”
There was so much resentment built up inside of me that I was honestly afraid to open my mouth out of fear of what might slip out.
It was a good thing that I was heavily medicated in this moment or I might have lunged for the prick.
“Have you spoken to the Gards?” Mam asked, pulling a tissue from the sleeve of her cardigan and wiping her nose.
“Why?”
“Because I think we need to get our stories aligned,” Darren answered for her. Another man answering for her. Another fucking boss. “We need to figure out how we swing this to the Gards.”
“There’s no story to align,” I deadpanned. “I won’t lie for either one of them. Never again. As far as I’m concerned, she’s as responsible for what happened to Shannon as our old man is. So you two can swing whatever the fuck you want, but leave me out of any bullshit fabrications.”
“Come on, Joey, I know you’re hurting right now, but you’re not the only victim here. Mam is a victim, too.”
“Did I say I was a victim?”
“No, I’m saying that you’re a victim—”
“You don’t know the first thing about me,” I spat, cutting him off. “You don’t know what the fuck I’ve been through, so don’t swan in here trying to feed me a line and slap a label on my forehead. I’m done with it.” I turned to my mother and doubled down. “I am done with you.”
I was.
I meant it.
I fucking meant it.
Never again would I give her the opportunity to let me down.
“I know you’ve been going down a bad path for a long time now,” Darren had the gall to say. “I also know that you’ve got yourself a little Joey on the way.”
“Good news travels fast,” I replied coolly. “Get all that from one of your mommy and son phone calls?”
“She’s the girl from the wall, right? The one you had your eye on back in first year?”
“The fuck would you know about it?” I seethed, jaw clenching. “You weren’t around when I was in first year. You bailed, asshole.”
“I remember your reaction to her that day.”
“Good for you.”
“You got the girl pregnant while you’re still in school, Joe? Really?” His tone was dripping with condescension when he said, “Talk about following in the old man’s footsteps and repeating the goddamn cycle!”
“Don’t even think about lecturing me, asshole,” I snapped, refusing to show him how deeply he cut me with his words. “I am not our old man, and she is none of your fucking business!”
“And Shane Holland?” he continued to challenge, giving me a hard look. “Is he none of my business either? Goddammit, Joey, what did I tell you about messing around with that guy?”
“Shit, Dar, I can’t remember.” I shrugged. “How long’s it been since we spoke? Five, six years?”
“Joey.” He sighed wearily. “You know why I had to leave.”
“Don’t Joey me,” I sneered. “You don’t get to stroll back in here and call the shots. You’re not the patriarch of the family, asshole.”
“And you are?”
“I did the best I could with the hand I was given,” I shot back. “So, don’t look down your goddamn nose at my choices. At least I stuck around.”
“Please don’t fight with each other,” Mam pleaded, placing her hand on Darren’s shoulder. “We’re all family here.”
“No. you two are family,” I bit out, tone hoarse. “My family just left.”
“Wh-what do you mean?”
“That girl isn’t your family, Joe. We are.”
Not bothering answering either one of them, I pulled at the wires and leads attached to my body and climbed unsteadily to my feet.
“Joey, what are you doing?”
“Shannon,” I bit out, searching the small area for my clothes. “Aoife said she’s upstairs. Which ward is she on?”
“Joey, stop,” Mam cried, when I ripped the needle out of my arm and moved for my jeans that were hanging on the back of the chair next to my bed. “Lie down and rest. You’re not supposed to be out of bed.”