Deep in my thoughts, I let myself delve into the mess that was my life, all the while wondering how the fuck the girl sitting beside me was still, well, beside me.
Yeah, stash flushing aside, I knew I was punching.
And in the wrong.
I’d made a hash of everything.
Again.
I’d gone back on my word.
Again.
I’d let her down.
Again.
Nothing about our relationship was balancing in my favor anymore, and honestly, aside from my ability to put my dick to good use, I couldn’t see the appeal of being with me.
I thought she was done with me that night.
I expected her to be done with me.
My father assaulted her, for Christ’s sake.
No relationship, no matter how much love or loyalty there was, came back from a blow like the one ours had taken.
But here she was, mad as hell, and pulling on her boxing gloves to go another round with me.
I didn’t know how Molloy could love me after what he did to her, much less want to be with me. I sure as hell couldn’t stand the sight of myself.
“Joseph, do you need a hand with something?” our teacher asked, dragging my attention away from the window and to the front of the class.
I stared blankly up at her. “Huh?”
“Page 457,” she said with a weary sigh. “Eyes on the book please.”
Rolling my eyes, I turned my attention back to Molloy’s textbook laying open on our desk, the one I’d been using since the start of the year, and frowned when my gaze settled on one lone earphone.
The cord attached to it led back to the MP3 player balancing on Molloy’s lap under the desk, while the other earphone dangled from her right ear.
Picking it up, I discretely popped it in my left ear, and listened as Puddle of Mudd’s She Hates Me drifted into my ear.
Lovely.
What a sweet way to serenade your boyfriend.
Fuck. My. Life.
Turning the page in her copybook, I watched as Molloy hovered over the page, and scribbled something down before pushing the copybook towards me.
You’re an asshole.
Sighing heavily, I grabbed my pencil from behind my ear and quickly jotted down a response.
You’re only figuring that out now?
Reading over my words, she quickly put pen to paper and responded.
I was blinded by your big dick.
Shaking my head, I snatched the page up and wrote my reply.
So, you’re writing me notes and playing me love songs. Does this mean I’m out of the doghouse?
Her brows furrowed as she read my question and scribbled a furious response.
No, dickhead, you’re not out of the doghouse. Consider this note my version of throwing you a bone. As for love songs? Ha! You should be so lucky.
I smirked and wrote down a reply.
Yeah, well, this dickhead loves you.
You can’t write things like that.
Why not?
Because I’m trying to be pissed at you.
So? You’re always pissed at me, and I’m always loving you.
Okay, now you’re just being smooth.
Smooth like a Rolo?
Oh god, I’d love a packet of Rolos right now.
Check the front pocket of my bag.
“Aoife! Joseph!” A hand reached between us and snatched up the cord of the earphones, yanking the mp3 player away. Miss Murphy stood in front of our desk, MP3 player in hand. “What have I told the two of you about distracting each other in my classroom?”
“Do it quietly?” Molloy offered with one of her award-winning smiles etched on her face – the kind of smile that got her out of trouble on the regular. “Which we were.”
“Don’t do it at all,” Miss Murphy corrected, glowering. “Honestly, you two are old enough to know that bringing music into my class is not okay. This is your leaving cert year,” she urged with a weary sigh. “Your last few months to revise as much as you can to get you both through your exams.”
“Apparently, those two don’t need any practice with maths, miss,” Ricey piped up from the front of the class. “From what I hear, they’re both pros at multiplying.”
“Paul, back to your work please,” Miss Murphy admonished.
I watched as Molloy’s mouth fell open, and my back was up in an instant.
Molloy’s gaze flicked to Casey in the desk in front of us, who shrugged in confusion and mouthed the words ‘I swear it wasn’t me’ to my girlfriend.
“The fuck are you talking about, asshole?” I demanded, glaring across the room at the smarmy bastard leering at us.
“Your brother has a big mouth,” Paul continued.
“Kev?” she strangled out, and the look of hurt in her eyes was sobering. “Kev told you?”
“He’s been telling anyone who will listen to him.”
“No,” she choked out, shaking her head. “No, no, no, no.” She dropped her head in her hands. “This isn’t happening.”
“I dodged a bullet with you, didn’t I? What a fucking cliché you turned out to be,” he sneered. “Good fucking job on ruining your life, Aoife.”
A cliché?
Good at multiplying?
I felt the air leave my lungs in a rush. “What. The. Fuck.”
“I don’t…I, uh…” Exhaling a ragged breath, Molloy choked out a sob. “Oh Jesus.”
My heart slammed wildly against my chest, as I turned my attention to the girl sitting beside me.
“Molloy.”
I wasn’t fucking stupid.
“Molloy.”
I could hear the penny dropping.
“Molloy.”
Shit, I could hear the sound of my pulse ringing in my ears.
“Aoife!”
“Joe,” Molloy whispered, turning her panicked eyes on me. “I…”
“Looks like he’s having trouble doing the maths,” Danielle laughed, joining in. “Let me help you out with that, Joe,” she added, looking only too happy to throw her two cents into the equation. “Your penis, plus her vagina, equals a baby.”
Everyone in class went deathly silent.
Aside from a few sharp intakes of breath, you could have heard a pin drop.
Meanwhile, my heart thundered in my chest, as my entire fucking world came crashing down around me.
“I told you that you wouldn’t reach graduation without a baby in your belly,” Danielle sneered. “Looks like I was right.”
“Oh god.” Choking out a pained sob, Molloy shoved her chair back and bolted out of our desk, moving for the classroom door quicker than I could process what the fuck was happening.
“Aoife!” Miss Murphy called after her, before turning her wide-eyed, horrified gaze on me. “I didn’t know.”
“Neither did he, by the looks of it.”
“Shut up, Paul!” Miss Murphy barked, red-faced, as she continued to stare at me expectantly. “Joseph, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know.”
Unable to comprehend a word of what was coming out of her mouth, I rose to my feet, stunned that they could still hold my weight, and walked out of the classroom, ignoring the sound of whispers as the rumor mill kicked into high gear, no doubt.
My entire body was on fire, rattled further by an anxious tremor, when I reached the corridor and my eyes landed on Molloy.
My feet faltered when I took in the sight of her leaning against the wall opposite our classroom door in the empty corridor, clearly waiting for me. “Joe.”