“My mother was from Noreg, and after my father died, she moved back there. I would visit from time to time—this was long before I sailed with Vice.”
Ari murmured at the mention of Avice. As far as she was concerned, the Pirate Queen was a living legend, even if, to me, she was the little sister whose snot I’d wiped away.
“You can guess the next part…” Perry arched an eyebrow.
“Don’t tell us”—Ella cocked her head—“you met a dashing Northman who treated you like the queen you are?”
Perry scoffed. “Something like that. We married. We were happy. We had a child. We were even more happy.”
I swallowed, my half-finished drink forgotten as I waited for the but.
“There was an attack.” Perry’s brow pulled low, and my heart squeezed for her. “Our girl… I say ‘girl’—she was fully grown by then. A young woman. Some were killed. Some were taken. We couldn’t find any sign of her.”
Eyes burning, I thrust my hands in my lap so I didn’t reach out to her.
“She was gone. We searched, but…” Perry shook her head. “It took a long while, but eventually I accepted it. My husband, though…”
Ari scooted to the edge of her chair and slid her arm around Perry’s shoulder. Ella stroked her hair, while Rose reached across the table and squeezed her hand. I sat on mine, the need to comfort her scouring my heart.
“He sank and sank and sank… I tried to pull him out. I knew it would take time, but… he never accepted it. He raged and drank and raged, and one day I realised I hadn’t seen my husband for years. Instead, I was married to someone bitter and vicious, and despite every attempt, I couldn’t bring him back.”
With a sad smile, she squeezed Rose’s hand and tilted her head into Ella’s touch. “And finally, I understood—if he didn’t want to come back, I couldn’t make him. I wasn’t making him any happier—if anything, I just reminded him of our daughter, since she looked so much like me. And he certainly wasn’t making me happy. We were locked in misery. Thankfully, divorce is a lot easier in Noreg than Albion.” She shot me an apologetic smile. “We parted ways, and I set sail, met a pirate named Vice, found Ser Francis Drake’s treasure, etcetera, etcetera, and wound up here.”
A heavy quiet filled the room, punctuated only by Ari sniffing.
“Not the best adventure story, I know.” Perry gave us a half-hearted smile. “But there is a lesson to be learned from my misfortune. Things outside our control can rob your happiness in an instant. You can’t stop it. But don’t let the things that are in your control do the same.” She gave me a long look that made me gulp down the last of my drink.
Memento mori. Death comes for our lives… but also for our happiness.
“There’s something you’re leaving out of this tale.” Ella topped up all our glasses and narrowed her eyes at Perry. “Why would you be concerned about fae caring that you’re divorced?”
Perry chuckled. “I’m sure you can guess.”
“I did hear certain sounds on our journey from Albion. Late at night when we were all meant to be sleeping. And that innkeeper commented on your bed not being used that time…”
“Nothing gets past you, does it?” Shaking her head, Perry scooped up her freshly filled glass. “You’re going to have to get me a lot more drunk before I tell you more.”
Ella took that as a challenge, and for the next couple of hours the room filled with laughter and secrets and the warmth of friendships forged in shitty circumstances.
“It made me so happy to see you laugh today.” Eyes bright, Ella stood in the antechamber, hands clasped while Rose yanked coats down from the hooks.
“You do know I’m coming with you, right?” I chuckled as Ella stood there like she was saying goodbye. “We have a play to get to.”
“This one’s yours,” Rose slurred as she held my coat out to Ariadne.
“Oh, gods.” Ari tiptoed, replacing my coat. “No, no, no. Let me do that.”
Oblivious, Ella shook her head and studied me. “You looked so tired last week.”
Perry turned from smoothing her hair in the mirror and nodded. “We were worried about you.”
“I’m fine.” I shrugged. “I—”
“Stop saying that, you big… something.” Ella giggled and grabbed me in a hug.
I laughed. I hugged back, cheek tingling.
She went stiff.
And I realised.
Her warm cheek was on mine.
The gasp tore through me as I shoved her away. Perry caught her rigid body.
Rose guffawed. “Didn’t know you were that drunk.”
Ari squeezed her arm, staring.
From Ella’s cheek, blackened tendrils spread across her skin. Her whimper woke me from my horrified stupor.
The world pitched like someone had pulled the ground itself from beneath my feet.
I’d poisoned Ella.
I’d…
My heart leapt, like it just needed one great beat to force blood into me and make me move.
I tore off my necklace and fumbled with the lid, my shaking hands useless. Perry went to help. “Don’t touch me!”
Ella wheezed, fingers clawing as an awful high-pitched sound came from her throat, like she was trying to scream but didn’t have breath to.
Quickly. Quickly.
My vision tunnelled to the potion bottle, and I dragged in a breath, held it, and gripped the lid. I turned it, chin wobbling as Ella went silent.
She was dying. Maybe already dead. I’d killed her.
Oh gods, I’d killed her.
“How many fucking times does this thing need to turn before it comes off?” My voice broke as I shouted, every part of me raw.
Then, with a soft clink, the lid dropped to the floor.
Ella lay still. So, so still.
My ears roared, leaving only muffled sounds in the rest of the room.
Move. Fucking move, Katherine.
Holding the precious bottle in both hands, I bent over Ella and tipped the antidote into her gaping mouth.
“Please.” I didn’t know who I begged, but I did. “Please.”
I waited.
She didn’t move.
It was just a hug. The thing I’d wanted from her for so long. A hug.
On the edge of my awareness, Rose held Ari, who buried her face in Rose’s chest. Perry sat back on her heels.
“Do something,” Ari sobbed.
There was nothing more I could do. The antidote was supposed to work. I’d left it too late. I was too slow. The lid.
It was just a hug.
I covered my face and shook my head, taking a long moment to realise I was still whispering it over and over again: “Please. Please. Please.”
A choked cry filled the antechamber.
“Ella?” Perry’s low voice barely registered over my begging.
Ella sat up, clutching her throat, sucking in great lungfuls of air. Pale, yes, but the dark veins had gone.
Rose laughed, and Ari launched at Ella, flinging her arms around her.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
“Good fucking gods,” Ella rasped. “Fuck. Fuck.” She looked up at me and chuckled. Maybe relief. Maybe hysteria.
I fell back, pressing myself against the wall, like its solidity might bring sense to the world.