“Is it true?” she asked. “About your mother?”
I blinked at her, surprised. I had not taken more than five paces from the hall. “How did you know?”
“Ah. Most royal audiences are terribly dull. When it was reported that raised voices were heard—” She grinned as she looked around. “You’d be surprised at how many found something that required urgent attention here.”
Her smile faded as she pulled me aside, away from keen ears. “Is your mother really Chang’e, the Moon Goddess?”
Was there anger in her voice? Resentment? All those times she had spoken of her own family, I had not said a word, letting her believe mine were deceased. I could not blame her if she never wanted to speak to me again. It might be better for her if she did not. Coupled with the disfavor of Their Celestial Majesties, I was both an unworthy and dangerous friend to have.
“Yes,” I said, bracing myself for harsh words.
Instead, she reached out and hugged me. “I’m sorry about your mother,” she said, releasing me. “But I’m mad at you, too. I would never have told anyone.”
There were other things I had told her in confidence, things she guessed that she kept to herself. “I couldn’t say anything, not until I knew it would be safe.”
She nodded, slowly. “I understand. Though I doubt your news was pleasing to Their Celestial Majesties.”
“As pleasing as a zither with a snapped string.” I frowned, recalling the empress’s hissing rage, the emperor’s . . . he had been angry at first, to be sure. Yet he had seemed oddly satisfied when I left. He should be, I told myself, getting twice the labor for a single wage.
“And now, I must somehow persuade four dragons to surrender their pearls to the emperor, if I want a hope of seeing my mother again.” I could not help wondering then—if I failed, if I proved myself of no further use to the Celestial Kingdom, would the emperor’s promise to me still hold? Would my mother be safe from the empress’s malice? Would I, even as far away as I would be in Wenzhi’s homeland?
“Why the pearls?” I asked aloud. “Isn’t the Imperial Treasury overflowing with jewels?”
“All I’ve heard is the dragons guard their pearls well, that they’re precious to them though the stories don’t say why.” Shuxiao gestured at the golden dragons which gleamed from the jade roof, a luminous orb resting securely within each jaw.
I blanched at the thought of those curved fangs sinking into my flesh. Was this a cunning plot to get me devoured, Crimson Lion Talisman and all? Would that not solve the emperor’s dilemma, in one stroke ridding himself of my troublesome presence and, yet, honoring his word? My gut twisted at the thought.
Shuxiao tapped my arm. “Are you all right?”
“I’m not sure.” I was numb inside. In the span of a morning my heart had soared with hope, been sunken by fear, and now rocked in a sea of turmoil.
“Well, don’t get yourself killed yet. I’ve always wanted to visit the moon,” she told me with a laugh.
“I’m not planning to, although the dragons might decide otherwise,” I said darkly.
“Then we’ll have to ensure they don’t.”
“We?”
She folded her arms across her chest. “I’m coming with you.”
Hope flared in me before it was abruptly doused. She was a Celestial; her loyalties lay here. She served the army to protect her family—how could I so selfishly undo her sacrifice, exposing her to the emperor’s wrath?
“No, you can’t abandon your position.” When she started to protest, I continued, “Listen. My father slew the empress’s kin. My mother defied the emperor. I’m in disfavor, too. You can’t get drawn into this; you have your own family to protect. What if Their Celestial Majesties took their anger out on them?”
Her face fell. “I couldn’t bear that.”
“Neither could I. Because we are the same,” I said somberly. “We will do things for our family—our loved ones—that we would not for ourselves. I only learned this about myself after I left my home. Some might call us fools. Those who don’t understand, never will.”
She did not protest, although she seemed troubled still. “You can’t go alone. It’s too dangerous. What if I joined you without anyone knowing?”
“I’m just asking the dragons for their pearls.” I spoke with an assurance I did not feel. “Those of the Eastern Sea claim the dragons are peaceful. The worst thing they can do is refuse.”