Ella stretched out on the sofa, desperate for some comfort. “Who was that?”
Casey glanced at the cordless phone in her hand. “No one.”
“Was it Ted?”
“No.”
“Do you have herpes?” Ella asked.
“Wow. Where did the reticent Wellesley girl go?”
Using both hands, Ella pulled a pillow over her head. Her suffering was evident.
“No, I don’t have herpes.” Ella’s face went from pained to disappointed. “Sorry. But I had gonorrhea once. Does that make you feel better? My roommate had syphilis and a lousy case of genital warts, which had to be burned off. Another girl in my dorm got crabs. These things always seem like a bigger deal at the time. People should really get over the shame. Scientifically, it’s more like the flu or mono, right?” Casey believed what she just said, but she’d never actually told anyone about having had a venereal disease.
“They’re curable. Those—”
“Yeah. I also had an abortion. So pregnancy, it turns out, is curable as well.” Casey shrugged, hating it when people had to compare problems. A truly unwinnable tack in life. Did Ella want her to list more embarrassing things so she wouldn’t feel like the only one with rotten luck? Because if she did, Casey could oblige her easily. “What else do you want to know?”
Ella nodded thoughtfully. She had annoyed Casey. “I just can’t leave Ted. I made this vow. God hates divorce. That’s what Christ says in the Gospels.”
“Okay. But Ted fucked somebody else and gave you the parting gift. I think there are a few escape clauses in the Bible. Adultery is the biggie.” Casey was tempted to check, but she was fairly sure that the get-out-of-jail-free card could be found in Matthew.
“But you’re supposed to forgive again and again. And he has repented.”
“Ah. A lovely idea, and I’ll remind you the next time I screw up.”
Ella didn’t laugh. She looked as if she were thinking very hard. “If I left him, where would I live? I don’t even have a job.”
“For a while you can stay with your dad. You can stay with me. I like kids. After a while, you’ll be able to take care of you and the baby. Wait, you can stay here and make Ted get out. Why do you have to go?”
“To go from my husband’s house to my father’s house. What have I done?” There was outrage in Ella’s voice, as if it weren’t fair. “I majored in art history, got married, worked in development for two years. My husband got bored with me in bed after eighteen months. No, it must have been much, much less than that. Five months? Six? Oh, my God. He cheated with a woman everyone else has slept with at Kearn Davis. Why? And he gave me herpes. You know, I only had sex with one man.”
Casey heard the indignation, and it irritated her. “Even if you had sex with fifty people, no one deserves to get sick, Ella. Sexual encounters should not involve discipline. I just find that hard to take. Would it be better if I got herpes? I had sex with more than one man, and I hope to have more sex. With more men. What would that prove if I got some STD? I don’t know. I’m sorry Ted did this. And I’m very sorry you have herpes. But herpes is supposed to be one of those chronic things without much effect, anyway, I think—”
“That’s not what I meant.” Ella was frustrated, having expected more sympathy. “Never mind.” But it did feel like some sort of unwarranted punishment. “I’m just pathetic. I feel like I should at least be sexy if I’m going to have this thing. Like more notches in my belt. My life. . .” Ella exhaled. “I did things wrong, or I didn’t do enough things. I don’t know. I’m sorry.”
“Ella! You’re not even twenty-five. It’s not quite over, you know. I’d hang on to the towel if I were you.” Casey stared hard at Ella’s face, wanting her to pay attention.
The building intercom buzzed, and Casey jumped up.
“It’s your father,” she said. “He’s coming up.”
Ella’s lower lip moved slightly.
“Are you okay?”
“I can’t tell him.” Ella wiped her eyes with her hands.
“You want me to stay? For a little while?”
“No. You have to get back. Thank you, Casey.” Ella nodded to keep from crying. “Thank you for—”
“Hush. You sure you’re okay?”
“I’ll be good.” Ella tried to smile.
“I know.”