Haley stood up and went to a small cabinet on the back wall, took out a bottle of Gentleman Jack, and poured two fingers in a red plastic cup. She handed it to Risa and then sat back down and held up her glass of milk. 揟o accepting change, no matter what.?
Risa sipped the whiskey and nodded. 揟hanks for this. I didn抰 know your mama ever drank. Aren抰 you going to have one with me??
揘ope, my stomach is a little touchy. Nerves and stress, I抦 sure, but I don抰 think I抎 better have whiskey,?Haley answered.
揙kay then, to accepting change, but we don抰 have a choice in the matter, for the most part,?Risa said. 揑t can blow in like a tornado, or kind of slow梥trolling along humming, in the case with Paul. But it will come, and it will affect a life no matter what.?
揥hen we look back, we can see that we didn抰 have to do the things we did, but maybe at the time, it seemed to be the right choice, but we did have one. I didn抰 have to take that job in Alabama. I could have stayed in Texas, but at the time I wanted to be totally on my own, and as long as I was in Texas, I would depend too much on my parents. Now I wish I would have stayed here so I could have spent time with Mama.?
揌ow are you really holding up after finding that letter??Risa asked. 揈vidently you抮e having as much trouble sleeping as I am.?
揑抳e got questions that will probably never get answered.?Haley took a sip of her milk. 揥as I born because my mama and her boyfriend were careless, or was I the product of date rape or something like that? If that was the case, why didn抰 she just put me up for adoption??
揙r terminate the pregnancy??Risa said.
揗ama would have never let my sister do that.?The icy-cold milk settled her nervous stomach梐 condition that she抎 been battling since her mother passed away so suddenly梑ut it did nothing to answer all the questions in her mind. 揝he wasn抰 super religious, but she couldn抰 have handled a termination. Maybe I抣l find something in this house that helps me get through all this. Right now, I want you to know that having you and the girls here is a big plus. I feel like I抳e got family around me.?
揟hank you. I sure don抰 want to be a burden, and if棓 Risa started.
Haley held up a palm and shook her head. 揇on抰 even think like that. We are more than friends, and you are helping me as much as I抦 helping you. We抮e talking through problems, so basically, we抮e in a group therapy session. Speaking of that, why did the queen bee in Kentucky kick you out, anyway? If I抦 prying, you don抰 have to answer that.?
揃irth control pills.?Risa shrugged. 揑t all boils down to birth control pills.?
揥hat??Haley抯 brow furrowed.
揓ust what I said. According to Martha, any kind of birth control was taboo, and using it was right next to worshipping Satan. She believed wholeheartedly in the Quiverfull movement and quoted those verses in Psalms almost on a daily basis: Children are a heritage from the Lord. Offspring are a reward from Him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one抯 youth.?
揂nd you used birth control pills, right??
Risa nodded again. 揑 got them right after the twins were born and managed to keep them secret for sixteen years. Martha was of the opinion that babies are blessings straight from God, and sons are put on pedestals. She told me that I must be sinning because God had closed up my womb like he did when women sinned in the Bible.?
揝weet Lord!?Haley gasped. 揌ow did you survive as long as you did? Do any of the other daughters-in-law sneak around and use birth control??
揑 think some of them have figured out how to get around producing a baby a year by using the rhythm method, but it wasn抰 something anyone talked about, not even in the kitchen when we all gathered around to wash dishes after Sunday dinner. Several of them had ten or more children, so the weekly family dinner was a big affair.?
揚aul didn抰 take up for you??Haley could hardly believe that her friend had lived in that kind of situation. 揟hat抯 like living in a commune.?
揧ou got it!?Risa raised her glass in a toast. 揟here was the underlying fact that Paul抯 old girlfriend became a widow last year. She抯 the woman that Martha had picked out for him, so I wouldn抰 be surprised to see them get back together real soon.?
揥hy didn抰 he marry her back then??Haley asked.
揟hey dated from the time they were in junior high school. After graduation, she broke up with him for one of his buddies. Paul joined the army without asking or telling anyone in his family. They almost disowned him over the whole thing, and then he married me梩hat was two strikes, since his mama didn抰 approve of him marrying a woman outside of their faith. Somewhere in Corinthians it talks about not being unequally yoked with unbelievers. I thought I抎 been raised in a strict religion, but Martha抯 was even worse, and it wasn抰 until I had the twins that Martha accepted me into her church.?