“Halya is in bed. She was asking for you.”
Katya wiped the back of her hand across her eyes and set the journal back in its hiding spot. “I’m sorry. I come up here to think sometimes. I’ll go sing to her now.”
Kolya walked towards her slowly, the look on his face indiscernible. “Who were you talking to?”
Katya stiffened as color flooded her face. “No one.”
He stopped inches from her. His hand moved up to cup her cheek, his words piercing. “Who do you love?”
Katya’s mouth wouldn’t move to answer the simple question he’d asked. She drew in a ragged breath and tried to tear her gaze away from his, but his other hand came up and cradled her face.
“Is it me?”
“Why?” She exhaled the question out into the space between them—one word encapsulating so many questions. It unlocked something inside of her, freeing the frustration she’d been choking on for months, and she found her voice. “Why do you care? You may love me like a wife at night, but you barely look at me in the day.”
Kolya dropped his hands and his gaze. “I’m sorry. I know I’ve pushed you away, but I’ve been so confused about my feelings. About Alina and Pavlo. Can you forgive me?”
“There’s nothing to forgive. I’ve had the same confusion.” She grasped at the shattered pieces of herself, pulling them together, finding strength, then took his chin and pulled it up so she could look in his eyes. “But I need to know now. How do you feel about me, Kolya?”
Kolya stared at her, his brilliant blue eyes shimmering like the summer sky. “I’m hopelessly in love with you, Katya. I can’t deny my true feelings any longer. And I don’t think Alina and Pavlo would want us to. After everything we’ve lived through, they would want us to be happy.”
His hand slid around to the back of her head as he kissed her. His firm lips pressing against hers reinforced all the feelings he’d put into his speech. Katya kissed him back, the broken shards inside her smoothing out into a beautiful path towards her future.
33
CASSIE
Illinois, June 2004
Cassie set the plate of varenyky on the table in front of Nick. Birdie was down for the night, and Nick had come over after work to help Cassie finish the journal. Luckily, Bobby had a good store of frozen varenyky that Cassie could boil up quick and serve with fried butter and onions. The crescent-shaped dough pockets of potatoes and meat were by far one of Cassie’s favorite foods, but she’d never mastered the uniform shape and pinch technique that Bobby made look so easy. There was no way she was tackling making those on her own while Bobby or Anna couldn’t help, and she knew Bobby wouldn’t mind her using her stash to feed Nick.
“Thanks for the late dinner.” Nick scooped three of the meat varenyky onto his plate, then topped them with the sour cream Cassie had grabbed from the fridge. “What’s the latest from the hospital?”
“She hasn’t woken up again since we all talked to her yesterday.” Cassie got up to turn off the stove before the tea kettle could whistle. She poured hot water into her cup and sat next to Nick.
Nick paused with the fork halfway to his mouth. “What does Birdie say? Does she mention Alina anymore?”
“No. Not a word about her since she gave Bobby her ‘message’。” Cassie air quoted the word message.
“Well, whatever happened, it seemed to give Bobby some peace. That’s probably all that matters in the end.”
“You’re right. I should let it go.” Cassie pulled the box across the table and took out the journal. “You know, it’s been brutal waiting for you to come over so we could read this.”
A mischievous glint shimmered in Nick’s eyes. “What was brutal? Waiting for me or waiting to hear what’s inside?”
“Both, I guess.” The response slipped out before she could stop it, and she flushed. She was supposed to be holding herself back, but the banter came so easily with him. Everything did.
She straightened in her chair and opened the laptop, then redirected the conversation to where it needed to be. “So, now we know why Bobby feels so guilty about Alina.”
Nick went to the sink to wash his hands. “And we know that eventually your grandmother ends up happy with your grandfather.” He spoke casually, but she could feel the intensity beneath his words, and her mind raced.
How had Bobby opened her heart after such tragic losses? Will I ever be able do the same?
Cassie cleared her throat. “Right, but there’s been no mention of him yet, and now she’s married to Kolya.”