He searches my face. “Is that a good thing?”
“Mostly.” I try to find the words to explain the shift in my thoughts, and I’m not sure how. “I have trouble trusting people here, but trust never came easily for me back home either. Faerie might have its own problems, but the fae are no more cruel and selfish than humans.”
He studies my face, as if he might find all my lies and secrets written there. “And what does that mean for us?”
I step closer to him. When I take his hand, I feel every bit the traitor I am. “It means, I hope you won’t give up on me yet.”
His eyes widen and his nostrils flare. “I don’t know how to give up on you, Abriella.”
I’m too much of a coward to hold that beautiful gaze, so I drop his hand and look down at my wine. “This is Litha, then?” I ask, if only to fill the silence.
“It is. Though as you noticed, we’ll use any excuse to dance and drink wine to excess.”
“Can I ask why a celebration of the day is held at night?”
He scans the crowd, the fires, the musicians. “Because you can’t have the longest day of the year without the shortest night. And because we honor the sun by bringing the fires into the night. They’re lit before the sun sets and will burn until she rises, symbolically lighting even the short hours of darkness.”
“And what do the wine and dancing symbolize?”
“Our zest for life.” He grins, his gaze dropping to the untouched wine in my hand. “Is it bad?”
“I haven’t tried it.” I consider it a moment. The bubbles cling to the sides of the glass and sparkle in the firelight. “Doesn’t faerie wine make mortals lose their inhibitions?”
He laughs. “Much like mortal wine, that depends entirely on how much of it you drink.” He reaches for my glass and our fingers brush as he takes it. The single touch sends me back to my chambers, his hand on my waist, his mouth pressed to mine, and tingles race down my spine. He swirls the contents and sniffs it before handing it back to me. “It’s safe if you’d like to try it.”
It’s my turn to sniff the golden liquid. It smells like sun-ripened cherries. I hold Sebastian’s gaze as I bring it to my lips. The sweetness and flavor explode on my tongue, and warmth immediately fills my chest. I hum appreciatively and drain half the glass. “Wow. It’s so good I want to swim in it.”
Sebastian chuckles. “Summer solstice wine is my favorite too.”
We watch the fires and the guests as I finish the rest of the glass. Worried that my curiosity will seem suspicious, I don’t let myself ask about the library yet. Spending time with Sebastian is no hardship, and surprisingly, no one bothers us. Not even when the music turns slow and couples start dancing all around the lawn.
I frown suddenly. “I expected the other girls to drag you away from me.” As my maids dressed me tonight, they told me that of the original dozen who were invited to stay at the castle, six have been sent home. I wonder if Sebastian’s interested in the girls who remain. Once he discovers my deception, will he be happy to choose one of them?
He tears his gaze off a group of dancers and looks at me. “I have us glamoured so the humans can’t see that we’re here.” He grins at me. “I wasn’t about to miss out on spending tonight with you.”
I want to shake him and tell him I don’t deserve the adoration in his eyes. I’m the worst. A liar. A thief. A manipulator. Instead, I give my empty glass to a passing servant and loop my arms behind Sebastian’s neck. “Then perhaps we should dance while we have the chance.”
He slides his hands around to the small of my back and pulls me closer. I rest my head on his chest and sway to the music. My first night in Faerie, the music was a syncopated, drugging rhythm that lured me into its thrall. This is different. If anything, this music reminds me of home. It reminds me of my mother playing the piano while Jas and I played with our dolls. It reminds me of the dances my cousins attended while I was busy cleaning and trying to make my payment to Madame V. It reminds me of what I could be building with Sebastian if I didn’t need to trick him to save my sister.
It is precious memory and missed opportunity. It is the bitter and the sweet.
Sensing the shift in my mood, Sebastian pulls back to look down at me. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
There’s your opening, Brie. I hesitate, wanting to be Bash and Brie for a little longer. But I don’t have time for hesitation. “I was thinking how, after a night like this, I might like to spend an entire day in bed reading.” I hate myself for exploiting this moment, but I make myself smile up at him. “Do you think you could show me the libraries? That way I can lose myself in a book next time you have to leave me for days.”