Seriously? She couldn抰 even cross her legs without biting down on her lip to prevent a moan from flying out. Everything was sensitized after being given such forceful treatment. Was she even fit to be in public right now?
Jasper reached across the table and squeezed her arm, sending a rush of diamond-encrusted tingles all along the limb. 揑抦 going to order you a drink, Rita. You look like you could use one.?
揟hanks.?She wasn抰 even going to argue or pretend vodka didn抰 sound like manna from heaven. 揝o, um. So卼his place looks fun.?
When Jasper lifted an eyebrow, Rita wanted to dive under the table. Maybe make a tablecloth fort. 揊un.?She could hear the rasp of his stubble as he stroked his chin, looking around the restaurant. 揝ure. I guess you could say that.?
She reached for her menu and flipped it open, seeing nothing, but grateful to have her hands occupied. 揑抦 sorry, I just don抰 know what to talk about after卼hat. You抮e supposed to go to sleep after something like卼hat, right??
His amusement flourished. 揌as that been your experience??
揑 have different experiences.?
He tipped her menu down, probably so he could actually see her. 揑t seemed like you were enjoying yourself. Was I wrong about that??
揧ou can抰 even ask me that with a straight face. That抯 how much you know you抮e not wrong about that.?
Instead of his seeming satisfied by her answer, a touch of worry crept over his features. 揂nd why is it bothering you now??
揅an we change the subject??
A few beats passed. 揧es.?He appeared deep in thought a moment, a line forming between his eyes. 揃ut only because I don抰 want to hear about how you usually start a date. Or end a date. Or anything even remotely in that neighborhood.?
Warmth spread in Rita抯 belly. 揙kay, then.?
揙kay, then.?With a shoulder roll, Jasper picked up his own menu. 揑 have to tell you, I抦 kind of nervous taking a chef out for a meal. Are you obligated to storm the kitchen if you don抰 like the food??
揧es, it抯 part of the oath we take,?she answered with a straight face, but she couldn抰 quite hold it. 揥hat is the best thing on the menu? I抦 not in a storming mood tonight.?
揅hicken milanese.?
揇one.?
Rita had to admit the restaurant had atmosphere. Slow, pumping mood music. Dim lighting, clusters of candles placed strategically around the seating area. The tables were spaced far apart, unlike in San Diego, where diners were usually crammed in due to high rents and limited space. Turnover had always been key at Wayfare. But not here, apparently. The waitstaff appeared just as relaxed as the customers, some of them even sneaking sips of red wine in the waiter station. Miriam would have appreciated the casual setting, although she never allowed alcohol until the final dish was sent out.
The reminder of her mother and the restaurant she抎 loved broke Rita抯 smile, but she attempted to shake herself when Jasper reached across the table and ran his thumb down the side of her cheek. 揑抎 love to know what you抮e thinking about.?
She stared to say Nothing, but saying that about her mother felt eminently wrong, so the truth tumbled out instead. 揗y mother. She ran a very different restaurant. I ran it, too, for a while.?Her hands were itching for something to do again, so she traced the base of her wineglass. 揥ayfare.?
Jasper said the name silently to himself. 揑 like that name. Why aren抰 you running it now??
揑t burned down.?
揝hit.?His double take was comical. 揑抦 real sorry, Rita. When??
Pressure built in her rib cage, memories of flames dancing and roaring up the walls. 揕ast week.?
For a few seconds, Jasper showed no reaction to that news. It was clear he was stunned at how recently the incident had occurred, but something chaotic was playing out behind his blue eyes, making the muscle in his cheek tick. Rita wasn抰 sure she wanted to know what it was. Or maybe she wanted to know every detail. 揥ere you working when it happened??When she nodded slowly, he cursed, falling back in his chair. 揑抦 feeling ill over that, beautiful.?
Light pinged between the pulse points of her body. 揇on抰 be. It抯桰抦梖ine.?
Jasper looked her over as if deciding whether to believe her, his expression serious. 揑s that why you don抰 want to cook anymore??
揥ho said I棓 Then she remembered the flashback in Rosemary抯 kitchen. The way she抎 frozen up, unable to perform even the simplest of tasks. Until now, she hadn抰 recalled saying those words to Jasper梩hat she didn抰 want to cook anymore. But she knew she抎 meant them. Knew she didn抰 want to be less than extraordinary anymore. Less than Miriam.
揌ey.?Jasper raked an impatient hand through his hair, appearing irritated with himself. 揑 didn抰 mean to pry like that. I抎 just been wondering why someone talented enough to graduate culinary school and run a restaurant厀ouldn抰 want to do what they love anymore.?
Her throat beginning to feel singed, Rita sipped from her water glass. She wanted to let it all pour out. Talent, ha! Questionable at best. I don抰 even know if I ever loved it. But she held back, afraid if she let those secrets go, somehow, somewhere, her mother would hear them and weep. The way she must have been inwardly weeping all those years when Rita couldn抰 rise to the occasion. 揥hat about you, Jasper? What do you love??
The debate between letting her change the subject and pressing for more took place on his handsome face, interspersed with flickering candlelight. But then her question seemed to sink in梐nd it sank low. 揑 love people. Family.?He reached for his beer. 揃ut I抦 not sure I love any one thing. Nothing lasting like you had.?A beat passed as he scrutinized Rita. 揧ou love Wayfare even though it抯 gone. It抯 in the way you say it.?
Had she really tried to write this man off as some no-account, revamped McConaughey? She would consider the possibility that he might be reading her thoughts梚f her thoughts were clear enough to be legible. 揧ou have to love something. What about the bar??
His laughter was short. 揗aybe at one time. Or maybe it was just a place for my friends to hang out. It抯 hard to remember what was going through my mind at twenty-one.?He scrubbed a hand along his jaw. 揑 sure as hell didn抰 realize what a mockery I was making out of my grandfather抯 life抯 work. He probably thought I would do something meaningful with the money he抎 set aside. Turns out he was wrong.?
Rita gathered that he was referring to an inheritance of some kind. An inheritance he抎 used to purchase the Liquor Hole. 揧eah, but you抮e doing something about it now, aren抰 you? Opening the eatery??
揧eah.?He nodded once, shifting in his chair. 揧eah. I抦 hoping it抯 not too late.?
揑t抯 not,?Rita said, surprised by her own vehemence. She actually had to restrain herself from reaching across the table and梬hat? Grabbing his face or hair or something? It wasn抰 clear, but it felt imperative that she convince him he would succeed. The eatery would be a success, if he just focused all his energy on it.
But wouldn抰 that make her the ultimate hypocrite? Even before her catastrophic dinner service her first night back from the reality show, she抎 been on a path to bludgeoning the restaurant抯 success to death. Success her mother had all but ensured. What business did she have trying to convince Jasper his outcome would be any different?
揑f you抮e doing it out of guilt or卪aybe you want to sleep better at night knowing your grandfather approves卛t won抰 work.?Despite her attempt to drown them with wine, the words climbed up her throat and dove out. 揙pen the eatery because you want to, not because you think it will make someone else happy.?