I was just hers.
THIS IS REAL
Poppy hid nothing as she bared herself to me, even though she trembled. Even though no one had seen her like this. She was that brave, that bold, and I was rooted where I stood, my heart thundering in my chest as my gaze left hers, following the sweet flush down her throat.
I’d seen a lot of bodies. Women. Men. Slim ones. Round ones. Those in between. Bodies that were smooth and absent of perceived flaws. Others whose flesh reflected a life lived. I’d seen bodies I’d completely forgotten, but I knew I’d never seen anyone like her.
Poppy had to be a goddess.
Because, my gods, she was absolutely breathtaking—every bit of the unending, lush softness of her curves. The fullness of her breasts and their deep rosy tips. The slight indentation of her waist and the way her hips flared, the lushness of her thighs and the hidden valley between them. I saw the scars she’d told me about before—the marks Craven claws had left behind on her strong forearm, the softness of her belly, and the ones on her inner thighs, and they too were beautiful—a testament to her strength and resilience.
“You’re so damn beautiful and so damn unexpected.” I rasped as I lifted my gaze to hers, more eloquent words failing me because looking upon her felt like both a sin and a blessing. A reward I had not earned.
But one I would take.
I moved faster than I probably should’ve, but I wasn’t thinking. I’d stopped the moment she undid that sash on her robe. I wrapped her in my arms, and then I took her mouth. There was nothing gentle in the way I kissed her. All my hunger and want came through.
And then I lost myself in her.
Poppy reached for my tunic at the same time I did. It hit the floor as I kicked off my boots. My breeches went next, and then there was nothing between us.
I stood where I was, letting Poppy look her fill, and she did. Her gaze traveled slowly over my chest and stomach, then lower.
“The scar on your thigh,” she said, staring at the faded brand. “When did you get it?”
“Many years ago, when I was dumb enough to get caught,” I said, brushing several strands of her hair back. Normally, I hated when someone mentioned the brand or looked at it, but with Poppy? I didn’t care.
I didn’t care about anything but her, nothing but right now.
Poppy’s gaze inched away, and I knew the moment she saw exactly how much I wanted her. She drew her lower lip between her teeth as she stared. My cock throbbed.
“You keep looking at me like that,” I told her, “and this will be over before it starts.”
Her cheeks flushed an even deeper pink. “I…you’re perfect.”
My chest seized because, fuck, I wished I were. If I were, I wouldn’t be here. “No, I’m not. You deserve someone who is, but I’m too much of a bastard to allow that.”
The skin between her brows creased as she stared up at me. “I disagree with everything you just said.”
“Shocker,” I murmured, curling an arm around her waist.
The way she inhaled at the contact of our bodies was fucking addictive. I lifted her, taking her to the bed. I carefully laid her down and then came down over her.
I held myself back, giving her time, even though every part of my being strained to feel the length of her body against mine, to discover what it felt like to be deep inside her. But this…this was a first for her. A lot of firsts. And I’d never been anyone’s first. I wasn’t perfect, but I wanted this to be that for her.
I slowly let some of my weight settle against her. I shuddered at the feel of her legs against mine.
Poppy swallowed. “Are you—？”
“Protected? I take the monthly aid,” I assured her, speaking of the herb that ensured unions weren’t of the fruitful variety. “I assume you’re not.”
She gave me that cute little snort.
“Wouldn’t that be a scandal?” I teased, skimming my hand over her right arm. The scars there were deep. How she hadn’t lost the arm or her life was beyond me.
“It would, but this…”
My gaze lifted to hers, and it felt like the entire keep shifted beneath and all around us. There was a skipping motion in my chest. The nape of my neck tingled as we looked at each other. My heart sped up. This moment…it felt like it had always been coming. As if every choice I’d made—that we’d made—had led to this. It was a crazy feeling, completely senseless, and yet… “This changes everything.”
I brought my mouth to hers, and this time I held myself in check. I mapped the line of her mouth with mine. I kissed her slowly, drawing her lip into my mouth and then parting her lips. I wanted to kiss her harder, deeper, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t let her feel the evidence of who I was like this, but I kissed her until she trembled beneath me, until I knew she wanted more.
Then I let myself explore.
I trailed my fingers down her throat and over the slope of her shoulders to the sweet swell of one breast. I flicked my tongue against hers as I felt her hardened nipple beneath the pad of my thumb. Her back arched, and her breaths against my lips turned quick and shallow. I drew my fingertips down her stomach, skating over the thin, jagged scars there and then lower, slipping my fingers between her thighs, through the soft dusting of curls.
Poppy cried out at the featherlight touch. I grinned, obsessed with how responsive she was. It would be a dream to tease and taunt her, to be cruel in the most decadent way and drive her to the brink of insanity with need. But there was no time for that.
There likely never would be.
Pain sliced through me, and for a moment, I thought she had drawn that dagger and put it to my chest. I stilled, my fingers moving gently over the softest part of her as my gut twisted—
She lifted her head, artlessly pressing her mouth to mine, jarring me from my thoughts. Her inexperienced kiss was…it was truly fucking magical, more seductive than any I’d experienced before.
I shuddered as I lifted my mouth from hers and then followed the path of my fingers. I kissed the side of her throat, a little startled by the urge to linger at her pulse. As I kept going, my jaw throbbed almost as intensely as my cock. I drew my lips over the delicate line of her collarbone and then tasted the skin of her chest. I slowed, my gaze flicking up. Her eyes were half-open as I pressed my lips to her nipple. She gasped, fingers clenching the sheet beneath us. Watching her, I drew the turgid flesh into my mouth.
Poppy’s moan brought an answering groan from me as she moved restlessly, guided by instinct. I grinned and then went lower, drawing my tongue over her stomach. She tensed as I neared her scars, and even as brave as she was, I knew having me so close to them worried her.
I would show her she had no reason to worry.
Drawing my mouth over the healed wounds, I pressed a kiss to them, paying them the respect they were due. Her breath caught, and I went even lower, below her navel. I hooked a hand around her thigh, spreading her to fit the width of my shoulders. My mouth inches from the damp curls, I looked up at her.
“Hawke,” she whispered.
I grinned. “Remember that first page of Miss Willa’s diary?”
“Yes.”
Holding her gaze, I kissed between her thighs. Poppy’s back bowed. I didn’t look away. Neither did she, but my heart pounded as I drew my tongue over her, sampling her, and gods, she tasted so damn good. So fucking sweet. I dipped my tongue into her heat, muscles throughout my body clenching with want. I shifted my head, flicking my mouth over the taut bundle of nerves.