Ascher wanted a new phone, Jax wanted a different nose ring, Cobra had his eye on a comic book （who knew he had hobbies?）， and Xerxes wanted a new supercar.
Sadie said Xerxes was being ridiculous and that she just wanted a new book.
Yet again, her aversion to spending money was extremely creepy and not relatable.
I aspired to spend all the fae palace gold. Nothing would make me happier than bankrupting the realm.
When I told Sadie this, she said I was greedy.
I didn’t see the problem.
Even as I argued with my friend about her acting like a peasant, the student’s screams made me uncomfortable.
Someone else was in pain because of me.
It was stupid because realistically I didn’t give a single shit about the man. Still, I couldn’t help feeling like darkness clung to me.
I was corrupted.
Evil.
Soulless.
When the dinner finally ended, students grabbed the screaming man and dragged him across the floor out the door.
There was a black scorch mark across the crotch of his pants.
From the way Malum was smirking at the other table, Cobra wasn’t the only one who’d intervened.
I inhaled enchanted smoke.
Exhaled with a long drag.
For a second, I’d forgotten I wasn’t a member of the functional, loving shifter legion.
I was a part of the academy legion: psychotic devils, ornery demons, a depressed fae queen, and a happy-go-lucky human.
We were the definition of dysfunctional.
I gave Sadie and Jax a hug, bumped fists with Ascher and Xerxes, made a face at Cobra, and flipped off Jinx, who mouthed, “Do the right thing.”
When I joined my teammates, I still couldn’t look John in the eyes, and I pretended I didn’t see the kings staring at me.
The demons raised their brows when I walked beside them in the halls.
“We’re not friends,” Zenith muttered angrily under his breath. “Stay away from us.”
I took a step closer.
He was such a funny guy.
I’d always loved his silent-but-deadly energy.
John gave me long looks over his shoulder, and the pressure on my chest intensified. The weight crushed me.
I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know how to reverse the past.
When we entered the room, I bumped into Malum.
He stood in the doorway, blocking everyone.
Zenith bumped into me from behind and shoved me forward. I pushed him back, and he ran into Malum.
Malum bumped into Scorpius, who turned around and shoved Vegar.
John swore when Zenith pushed him over and launched himself at Scorpius to get retribution for hurting his boyfriend.
Everyone pushed at one another.
Heat prickled the side of my neck, and I looked over midscuffle to find Orion staring down at me with wide, unblinking eyes. The men bumped into him, and he didn’t react. He just kept staring at me.
I rolled my eyes back in my head and stuck my tongue out at him.
John tried to pull Scorpius and Zenith apart. Their hands were wrapped around each other’s necks, and they were strangling each other. Kinky.
Malum had a flaming fist pointed at Vegar.
In the middle of the scrum, Orion stepped close and invaded my personal space. He whispered so quietly I barely heard him say, “Do that again and I’ll take you up on your offer, sweetheart.”
Too-pretty features glinted maniacally.
It took me a second to realize what he was talking about.
I pulled my tongue back into my mouth as a blush burned my cheeks. “That wasn’t what I meant,” I hissed with outrage. “I was pretending to be dead.”
We both ignored the bulge that was growing in his pants.
“Enough,” Lothaire bellowed loudly, and everyone broke apart. The reason Malum had stopped in the doorway was clear.
“In formation, recruits. Did none of my training stick in your fucking brains? Are you five years old?”
We stood at attention.
Legs spread.
Arms behind our backs.
Heads lowered.
Soldiers.
Killers.
Lothaire stood in our room and stared at the hearth with a forlorn expression. He tapped his fingers on the mantel like he was impatient.
It wasn’t a competition day, so I didn’t understand why he was here.
Lothaire sighed heavily as he looked at us. His skin had a grayish tint, and his single eye was almost as bloodshot as mine.
He looked like shit.
I didn’t care.
“You will be making a substitution,” Lothaire said as he paced back and forth. “Your new teammate will arrive tomorrow.”
Malum stood up straight. “What, that doesn’t make any sense. We don’t need a substitute. Who is it?”
Lothaire shook his head and walked toward where we stood.
All seven of us stilled, and the tension was palpable.
We held our breaths.
Waited for him to pull out his baton and beat the shit out of us. I fought the urge to flinch.
“You will learn soon enough,” Lothaire said curtly as he walked out the door.
He passed by me in slow motion, features pinched with sadness. He glanced down at me with longing on his face.
I frowned back.
He was already dead to me.
Lothaire disappeared into the crowded hall.
A beat passed as everyone processed what he’d said.
“What the fuck?” Malum exploded with flames. “I’m the captain. I should know what’s going on.”
Scorpius and Orion immediately surrounded him. They caressed him and whispered into his ear as they tried to calm him.
The demons retreated into their bed together.
John stood still beside me, and his olive skin was pale like he was going to be sick.
“Do you know what’s going on?” I asked him.
John just shook his head and climbed into bed without a backward glance.
He was uncharacteristically withdrawn.
It felt like a thousand-pound weight was crushing my sternum.
He’s sad because of what you did to him.
After I brushed my teeth and tied back my hair, the room was dark, since the curtains had been drawn. Everyone had retreated into their beds for the night.
Picking at my lower lip, I reviewed my options.
I didn’t have many.
Lying down on the carpet, I curled into myself. The floor was uncomfortable, but my mattress had been shredded to create a makeshift cot, and I wasn’t going to force my presence on John.
I’d just gotten into a comfortable position when hands scooped me up.
Before I could blink, I was positioned under fluffy covers with John’s arms wrapped around me.
I was cocooned in his warmth.
I started to pull away.
“Just go to sleep, Aran.” John’s voice cracked. “Please.” He hugged me.
The desperation in his voice made me pause.
“Okay,” I whispered and closed my eyes. The pressure on my chest lightened as John’s heart beat steadily against my back.
As sleep pulled me under, John whispered, “Please forgive me.”
I was too tired to ask what he meant.
In the future, I’d wish I had stayed awake to question him. I’d really wish I hadn’t passed out.
But I did.
Chapter 27
Aran
REVELATIONS
Metamorphosis—Day 36, hour 11
“You’re in my bed,” John said.
I grunted and rubbed morning grit from my eyes, confused why he was pointing out the obvious.