The Thrashers(93)

He shrugged. “Maybe she knew that was what you wanted to talk about.”

Jodi scowled at him. “Get to the point.”

“When we started making plans for prom, I could see that Emily thought she was going with us. She was talking about matching dresses and corsages, where we were going to dinner. So, yes, I did tell her I’d get her a corsage like ours.”

Jodi’s breath caught. “Why did you do that?”

“Because I thought she was gonna tell everyone about sleeping with Zack. I didn’t do it to trick her. You can check with the florist—there was a spare corsage that was never picked up. I told her she could go get it herself when it was clear she wasn’t in the limo with us.”

“Is that what you texted her that day?”

He paused, and she felt her breath wobble on a string.

“That’s what I told the police the text said.” His jaw was tense, and his eyes slid off over her shoulder, like he’d prefer not to look at her.

Jodi swallowed. “But that’s not the truth,” she said.

“No. I told her that in person, the day before prom when I told her to stay away from you.”

She stared at him, and then a snort burst from her. “From me? What do you mean?”

He ran a hand through his hair. “I was going to make sure she knew she wasn’t in the limo. I didn’t want any more people claiming we Thrashed somebody just because she couldn’t take a fucking hint.” He blew out a breath. “She said, ‘Me and Jodi are going together, so I guess she won’t be in the limo, either.’ And the way she said it, Jodi … it was like you had talked about it, but I knew we were all going stag.”

She crossed and uncrossed her arms, trying to fight the unease in her chest.

“So I gave the truth to her. I said, ‘Jodi doesn’t like you. Zack doesn’t like you. Nobody likes you, Emily.’”

Jodi felt her chest contract. She remembered Emily’s words through Kiera at the rose garden. No one’s ever talking to me. Only about me. Isn’t that what you said?

“That’s cruel, Julian.”

“It wasn’t,” he bit out. “It’s what needed to be done. You and Zack go around making friends with anybody, and me and Lucy and Paige have to pick up the pieces. I’m always stuck doing the dirty work.”

Her throat was tight. You and Zack. Like she’d been in this position before.

“Did you cut Oliver out during freshman year?” she asked.

He blinked at her, then rolled his eyes. “Come on, Jodi. You cut him out. If you really wanted to keep hanging out with that asshole, you would have. We weren’t all going to be one happy family—”

“Okay, I got it,” she snapped. “So, you told Emily we hate her. And somehow you’re still innocent of instigating her suicide.”

He reared back. “I never said that,” he whispered. Jodi felt chills crest across her skin. “She doubled down. She said she was going to tell everyone about her and Zack. She wanted you to hate him and choose her.”

Jodi rubbed her eyes. “That’s … that’s so dumb, Julian. Are you sure that’s what she meant?”

“She said, ‘if I tell Jodi about me and Zack, maybe she’ll finally be free of him.’ It wasn’t that hard to interpret. Anyway, that’s when I told her to stay away from you, that you were officially off-limits to her. And I…”

Jodi glanced up at him as he trailed off. “What?”

He looked up at the ceiling. “I ‘laid hands on her.’ I think that’s what the DA called it.”

Her brows furrowed, trying to understand. “What does that mean?”

He swallowed. “I hardly remember it. I had her cornered. I got in her face, and I guess I ‘touched her in a threatening way.’” He used finger quotes. “It was after school on Friday. No one was around, I thought, but someone still saw us talking.”

“So were you ‘talking’ or were you ‘touching her in a threatening way’? Which is it?” Jodi’s eyes searched his face.

He paused, and she held her breath. He had a far-off expression on his face. “You know, immediately after, I thought to myself, is this how my dad feels?” He ran an agitated hand through his hair. A wry laugh burst from his chest. “Like, do I frustrate him this much that he just…”

Jodi’s throat clicked and her eyes stung.

He was still staring at something past her shoulder when he said, “I didn’t hit her. I wouldn’t. I didn’t shove her. I think I hit the locker we were standing in front of. I remember the rumble of the metal after, but I didn’t put my hands on her. Maybe it looked that way.”

“Who saw it?” Jodi asked.

“I don’t know. They didn’t say.”

“So you scared her? The day before prom?” Jodi’s heart was cracking.

Julian hummed. “That was the problem, Jodi. I didn’t scare her.” He shifted, and his eyes finally lifted to hers. “I met the real Emily Mills that day. She was fucking smiling at me. The whole time. No matter what I said or how much I invaded her space. And then…”

He cracked his neck and blew out a laugh.

“What?” she said.