I spot her car and disappointment floods me that our evening is over. When I saw her in the restaurant I couldn抰 help but approach her table. I can抰 resist her. Even after all this time.
She looks up at me briefly, a soft flush coloring her cheeks. I wish I knew what she was thinking, but I don抰 ask. I don抰 have the right to know, not anymore.
Stopping by her car, I wait for her to say something. She抯 quiet, but she doesn抰 make a move to get in the car either.
Blowing out a breath, she unlocks her car. I expect her to get inside and not say another word to me, but she surprises me.
揝eeing you again ?it抯 different than I expected.?
揂 good or bad different??I wet my lips nervously, waiting for her response.
She shrugs, opening the door. 揑抦 still figuring that out.?
I stay on the sidewalk, watching as she starts up her SUV. She waves before she drives away.
My truck is in the direction we came from so I head back that way.
Driving around for while, letting my thoughts wander梞ostly to Salem because I抦 a sad fucker when it comes to that woman桰 pull into my driveway an hour later.
Shutting my truck off, I don抰 go right inside my house. Opening the fence gate, I head out back to my greenhouse. Easing the door open, I step into the place that has been my safe harbor and my greatest torment.
The entire interior of the greenhouse is filled with intricately petaled, pale pink peonies.
Originally, I meant to use my personal greenhouse to grow a variety of plants.
But after that year when Laith moved out, and the reality of my actions began to set in when I learned Salem was getting married, I started growing them and I just couldn抰 stop.
They became my last connection to her.
I抳e treasured growing them, nurturing them.
Grabbing the small shears, I start cutting.
It抯 the first time I抳e ever cut any of them梕xcept for spent blooms that needed to be removed梐nd lay the stems out on the table.
I swore I would never cut any.
Not unless they were for her.
I honestly didn抰 think this day would come, so I smile to myself as I put together the bundle of flowers.
CHAPTER 13
SALEM
揥hat are you doing??My mom asks from the doorway of the kitchen, her voice groggy and her eyes still half asleep.
揗om,?I admonish for the millionth time, 搚ou抮e supposed to let me help you.?
I scurry around the island to help her into one of the kitchen chairs. I understand her need for independence but dammit if it isn抰 going to be the death of me.
揧ou didn抰 answer my question.?
It doesn抰 matter how old you get, mothers will always be mothers.
揑 found some of my old candles at your shop. I was just taking them out of the box.?I point to the few already on the counter.
揙h, I had those pulled for someone.?
I laugh, not sure I抳e heard her right. 揥hat? For who??
揟hat doesn抰 matter.?She waves a dismissive hand. 揟ake them back to the store.?
揥hy??
揃ecause they抮e already paid for.?
揙h, right.?I shake my head, loading the candles back into the box. 揝orry, I didn抰 know. I was surprised you still had any left.?
She shrugs. 揑 held back some. That was the last of it.?
揌uh.?I put my hands on my hips, wondering why someone would pay and have her hold old candles. 揂re you ready for some breakfast??
揗aybe some scrambled eggs.?She looks a bit queasy talking about food. I can抰 imagine what it must be like to be in her position條ittle to no appetite but knowing you need to get something in your system.
揑抣l whip those right up.?
She gives a forced smile, but I know she appreciates I抦 here and helping. 揑 was thinking.?She clears her throat. 揑抎 like to do something with you today.?
I pull a carton of eggs from the refrigerator. 揂re you up for that??She was out at Georgia抯 for a few hours yesterday evening. I don抰 want her to overdo herself. 揑抎 like to get out for a while. It抯 a nice day.?
揥hat do you have in mind??
She toys with the tie on her robe. 揑 thought we could visit Seda and Caleb.?
I gape at her梟ot because of her asking to visit, that抯 understandable, but棑Mom, are you sure you抮e up for that kind of trip??
It抯 a few hours there and back and she抯 ?well, she抯 not in the best shape to put it lightly.
揑t might be easier if we stayed the night,?she acquiesces, with a nod, her slender fingers still rubbing against the material of her robe. She smiles sheepishly. I know she feels guilty because of the situation with Caleb, but I can抰 deny her request to see her granddaughter.
揕et me run it by Georgia and see what she thinks about you making the trip and I抣l ask Caleb too.?
揂ll right.?
I finish her eggs and add a piece of toast just in case she ends up wanting some to nibble on some before I step outside to make the calls.
It抯 warm outside with a slight breeze, the birds chirping merrily. I missed this place. This house. The town. Even the people in it.
揥ha棓 I gasp when my foot hits something it shouldn抰。
My eyes shoot to the last step, a startled gasp passing through my lips.
A bouquet of fresh pink peonies wrapped in Kraft paper lies there waiting.
I know without looking at the note attached that they抮e for me from Thayer. Bending down I pick them up. Each one is perfect, not one discolored petal or imperfection to find. I look around, like I expect him to be lurking somewhere, but I don抰 see him. I hold the flowers close, not sure how to feel about the gesture. I抦 not mad, but I am confused.
Six years.
I moved on.
Started a new life.
I never heard from him again.
He didn抰 reach out, but now he acts as if he wants to pick up where we left off梬ell, maybe not exactly there, but?Shaking my head, I set the flowers back down and walk away from them.
I don抰 have time to think about Thayer, to contemplate how and why he does things.
Do you want things to pick back up?
I pinch the bridge of my nose.
Yes.
No.
I don抰 know.
And not knowing is the scariest part of all.
After all this time, I think I expected to see him again and for the attraction to have lessened but that抯 not what happened at all. If anything, the pull is only stronger and that terrifies me. I can抰 allow myself to be broken by him again.
Once was enough and the only reason I survived was because I was growing our child.
For her, I was stronger.
For her, I didn抰 give up.
Inhaling a deep breath, I shove all thoughts of Thayer out of my brain and focus on the task at hand梒alling my sister and Caleb.
I抦 not on the phone long with either and pick up the flowers again, carrying them inside with me.
揈verything抯 a go.?I set the flowers on the cabinet, searching for a vase in the cabinet above the stove. 揥e抣l head out in about an hour.?
揥here are the flowers from??Her tone is suspicious.
揘o idea,?I reply, sounding equally as mystified.
揥as there a card??I conveniently slide the note away, planning to read it later.
揘ope. It must be from your secret admirer.?
She rolls her eyes. 揂h, yes, I get a lot of those. That makes total sense.?
揝martass,?I snicker, filling the vase with water.
She laughs. 揇on抰 sass me.?
揅an抰 help it.?I unwrap the flowers gently, putting them in the water one at a time.
揟hose are your favorite flower,?she remarks. 揌ow interesting.?
揑 know. What are the odds??
She shakes her head, fighting a smile. I narrow my eyes on her, but she抯 not looking my way. I can抰 help but wonder if she knows something about Thayer. I don抰 see how, but?揧ou better get my stuff packed up if we抮e going to leave in an hour.?