I learn many things from the photos, but my questions grow too.
Light starts to peek through the blinds. Laith is living in Denver, so he抯 hours behind the east coast, but he抯 going to have to deal. I need to talk to him, and I抳e waited long enough.
揥hat the fuck, man??He groans into the line.
揑 need to talk to you.?
揑t抯 like厰 He must look at the time. 揊our in the morning.?
揝alem came over last night.?
揢gh, you are not waking me up at the ass crack of dawn to give me a rundown on your booty call.?
揝alem is not a booty call, and we haven抰 been together since she got back.?
There抯 rustling and I know he must be sitting up in bed. 揧ou mean to tell me your celibate ass hasn抰 been all over that, yet? Come on, bro, you抣l be in a lot better shape once you get laid.?
揇on抰 talk about Salem like that. She抯 not just ?she抯 more than that, okay??
My brother knows all about Salem. All the gory details. He thought I was a fucking idiot for pushing the love of my life away梐nd he was right. I was the dumbest fucking idiot. I thought I was doing what was right. I didn抰 know how long I抎 be grieving and I just ?didn抰 want her to see me like that. I ruined us. Not her.
揜ight, right. I know. But it抯 four-fucking-o-clock-in-the-morning. Cut me a break. I抦 not a morning person.?
揑 have a daughter. With Salem. We have a child.?
He抯 silent for a minute and then there抯 a whistle of air escaping his lungs. 揌oly fucking shit.?
揟hat about sums up how I feel.?
揟hat kid has to be what? Like six??
揊ive.?
揊uck. That抯 crazy. No wonder you called me this early. This is a lot to process. Have you told Mom and Dad??
揑 just found out. You抮e the first person I called.?
揂w.?I hear him slap a hand to his chest. 揑 feel special.?
揇on抰 let it go to your head,?I grumble, raking my fingers through my hair.
揙h, I am,?he chortles. 揂dmit it, I抦 your favorite person.?
揘o.?
揟hat抯 right梥econd favorite, behind Salem. I抣l take it. But a kid, Thayer? A whole ass child? Wow. Fucking insane.?
I scrub my hand over my face. 揑 think I抦 in shock.?
揙f course you fucking are. She kept that a secret from you all this time,?he rambles, barely taking a breath. 揑t抯 a lot to take in.?
揝he knows about me梬ell, not me specifically, but that the guy Salem was married to isn抰 her biological father.?
As much as it hurt me that she went back to Caleb, right now I抦 actually kind of grateful for the dude. It抯 weird, I know, but he didn抰 steal her from me. He was there for her when she needed someone the most. He was young, but he did what I couldn抰 with my grief梙e stepped up to the plate and became a husband and father.
揥hat does this mean for you and Salem??
揥hat do you mean??
揑 mean, she kept a whole ass child a secret from you. That抯 kind of a big deal.?
揑抦 not saying it isn抰， but I抦 not throwing this chance with her away.?Laith has never met his Salem梙e doesn抰 get how fucking lucky I am to have a chance to do things over with her, to do it right this time.
揂ll this time and you still feel the same about her??
揧eah. I do.?
When you know, you know.
I knew then but I wouldn抰 let myself believe it. I believe you should learn from your mistakes, so that抯 what I抦 trying to do.
揝o, what抯 your daughter抯 name??
I smile before I even say it. 揝eda.?
揟hat抯 a weird name.?
揝hut the fuck up,?I growl at my younger brother. 揑t抯 a beautiful name.?
揝orry, my bad梟eed I remind you it抯 four in the fucking morning.?
揜ight, right. You抮e not a morning person. My bad.?
揥hen do you get to meet her??
I sigh, nerves rattling my stomach. 揑 don抰 know. Soon, I hope.?
揧ou know, despite this early hour I抳e learned something valuable from this conversation.?
揥hat??I ask hesitantly. I never know what抯 going to come out of my brother抯 mouth.
揂lways wear a condom before I go to pound town.?
With that final statement he ends the call, presumably to go back to sleep, and I get ready for work.
CHAPTER 22
SALEM
I抦 a jittery mess all day counting down in anticipation to my date with Thayer.
A date.
A real date.
I act like I抳e never been on a date at all with the way my palms keep sweating.
揥ould you stop pacing??My mom scolds with an amused smile. 揧ou already spilled water on me earlier and now you抮e going to wear a hole in the carpet with all that walking back and forth.?She mimes walking with her fingers. I open my mouth to reply but she silences me again, adding, 揂nd don抰 you dare try to use me as an excuse not to go again. I抦 living vicariously through you right now.?
I抳e already tried three different times to back out. Not because I don抰 want to go, I definitely do, but the guilt eats me up over leaving my mom even though a nurse is stopping by for her weekly checks and Georgia will be here with her梐pparently Georgia likes to supervise these visits.
揥hat if you need me??I argue, still pacing.
She huffs, adjusting the blankets on her lap. A rom-com plays softly in the background, but she抯 been paying more attention to me than it. 揧our sister is going to be here with me, and believe me, she抯 a hoverer. Besides, I do know how to work a phone to call or text. You worry so much about everyone else. Go out, Salem. Enjoy yourself. Have a nice time with a nice man.?
I cease my pacing, planting my hands on my hips. 揧ou make it sound so much easier than it is.?
She laughs, but it quickly turns into a cough. I move forward like I can help her and she抯 quick to wave me off. Once she抯 recovered, she says, 揟hat抯 the thing it is easy梚t抯 overthinking and making your brain run through every possible scenario that complicates things.?
She抯 totally right. Smoothing my hands down the blue and white floral dress I put on, I take a deep breath and do my best to silence my scattered thoughts. 揇o I look okay??
She crooks a finger, beckoning me forward. I bend down closer to her, and she grabs a piece of my hair, tucking it back behind my ear. The short pieces keep slipping free of the low bun I twisted it in.
Touching her hand gently to my cheek, her skin cool against mine, she says, 揧ou look beautiful, Salem. You always do.?
揘ot as beautiful as you.?
She snorts. 揝top trying to flatter me.?
揑t抯 not flattery.?I kiss her cheek. 揧ou抮e the most beautiful person I know, inside and out.?
When I straighten, there are tears shining in her eyes she tries to hide.
The side door in the kitchen creaks open and Georgia calls out a hello. I hear the thump of her purse hitting the floor, or maybe it抯 the kitchen table. She waddles into the room, glowing and all smiles.
揌ey, Mom.?She bends down as much as she can, wrapping her arms around mom抯 neck. 揕ittle sis.?She hugs me next. 揌ow抯 the day been??
揋ood,?I tell her, meaning it. Mom抯 been more alert and not in as much pain. It抯 all we can ask for, especially when I know it抯 so short lived.
揊eeling okay??She reaches for our mom抯 wrist, and I know she plans to check her pulse, but mom quickly tucks her arm against her chest.
揋eorgia, that抯 what the nurse is for. Why don抰 you take a seat??
Georgia pouts her lips but does as she抯 asked. 揇o you want anything to drink or a snack or something??I ask, wanting to busy myself with something.
揑 can get it myself棓 She starts to stand, but I wave her back down.