揧ou can抰 call a dying woman a liar.?
揥hy not??I抦 aware Thayer can overhear our entire conversation, but I don抰 care. 揑f the shoe fits厰
She cracks a smile. Thayer pulls out the chair at my side, his arm brushing against mine as he sits down. My treacherous body shivers梫isibly so.
揂re you okay??
I press my lips into a flat smile. 揝plendid. It抯 just a bit chilly.?
He gives me a funny look because it抯 anything but cold in the house. My mom is cold almost all the time these days and doesn抰 want the AC on.
揇inner smells amazing. Did you make it??
I turn to him, raising a brow. 揙bviously. Ow. You kicked me.?
My mom blinks back innocently. 揑 did no such thing.?
Thayer抯 eyes flicker back and forth between us in amusement. 揑 really appreciate you inviting me over, Allison.?
揑抳e told you棓 she coughs and instantly my hand holding my fork lowers, 摋call me Allie.?
揂llie,?he repeats. 揜ight, sorry.?
揂re you all right??I ask her.
I know Georgia mentioned with our mom抯 immune system being non-existent at the moment that she抎 be more susceptible to illnesses.
揑抦 fine. My throat抯 just a tad ticklish tonight.?
I eye her skeptically. Even Thayer looks worried.
It hits me, in moments like this, that she抯 dying.
That no matter what I do, or how hard she continues to fight, this is her final battle and there is no happy outcome.
It抯 one thing to know something, it抯 another to witness it.
揇o you want to go lay down??
She pushes the food around her plate. 揑抦 fine.?
揗om, if you抎 feel better laying down棓
She looks between the two of us across from her. 揗aybe that would be a good idea.?
I stand up to help, but Thayer urges me back down. 揑抣l help her,?he says in a hushed tone.
Before I can protest, he抯 moving around the table and helping my mom up and into the family room.
I stay seated, staring at my plate so she can抰 see the tears pooling in my eyes.
Thayer returns, his chair squeaking as it slides back on the linoleum floor.
揧ou don抰 have to stay,?I mutter, not looking at him.
揑抦 hungry,?is his gruff reply. 揑抦 not about to walk away from a home-cooked meal. I抦 too tired and lazy to cook most days and end up ordering takeout.?
My head whips in his direction, appraising the lean body beneath his clothes. 揇oesn抰 look like you eat unhealthy.?
His brow arches, lips twitching when he fights a smile. 揅hecking me out??
揇on抰 flatter yourself.?
He chuckles, taking a bite of mashed potatoes. 揧ou made these from scratch.?
It抯 not a question, but I answer anyway. 揧es.?I force myself to eat a bite, then another.
揥ould you happen to know anything about cupcakes showing up at my door a few days ago??He asks it in a way like he already knows the answer, so there抯 no point in lying.
揑 made them with my mom and she asked me to drop some off. That抯 all.?
Aka: Don抰 read into it.
He nods, rubbing his lips together. 揝alem, I棓
揘ot right now.?My words are biting, cutting, but I can抰 do this right now. Not with my dying mother in the next room. She抯 my focus right now. Not Thayer. He can抰 be.
揥e need to talk.?
We need to talk about way more than he thinks we do.
I mentally start building a wall around my heart. It抯 the only way I can operate around Thayer. I can抰梬on抰條et him get to me so easily. Not this time.
揇o you remember??I snap at him, my tone icy. 揇o you remember the last time I saw you? What you said to me??
His forehead wrinkles and he looks confused. 揑桰抦 not sure.?
揧ou told me you hated me.?He pales, horror stricken. 揟hat was the least of what was said, if I抦 being honest. And listen, you were drunk and grieving, but I survived a different kind of abuse before and I wasn抰 going to let you hurt me with words.?
揝alem棓 His Adam抯 apple bobs. 揑 didn抰 ?fuck, I can抰 believe I said that to you.?He shakes his head.
揑 know we need to talk,?I continue like he didn抰 say anything at all. 揃ut I can抰 do it right now. Not after just seeing you for the first time in so long.?Pushing my plate away, I stand without looking at him. 揑抦 not so hungry anymore. Lock up behind you.?
I walk out of the kitchen, past my sleeping mom, and upstairs. I lock my bedroom door behind me and hastily close the blinds. Doing everything I can to block out the hateful words he lobbed my way that night.
You抮e the reason he抯 dead.
I was distracted thinking about you and he抯 gone. You did this. It抯 your fault.
I hate you. Get out.
I wish I抎 never met you.
That last one was a massive blow to my heart. The others hurt, God did they hurt, but I knew they were the words of a broken father.
Curling up on my bed, I fall asleep.
In the morning, all the leftovers are put away and the kitchen is spotless.
There抯 a note left on the counter.
I抦 sorry.桾
CHAPTER 10
THAYER
When I crack my eyes open in the morning, my first thought is; I told her I hated her?
What a fucking bastard I am.
Salem has every right to hate me. I know I lost myself to my grief after Forrest抯 passing. It was something no parent should ever have to live through. There are days where the grief comes back full force and cripples me. On those days I end up calling my guys and telling them I won抰 be in to work, and I sit in the treehouse or visit his grave.
If only I hadn抰 been such a lazy fuck and gotten it built for him.
Maybe then ?maybe then.
揊uck,?I groan aloud, crossing my arm over my eyes.
I try not to let myself go down that path with my thoughts, but sometimes it抯 hard not to.
Shoving my sorry ass out of bed, I hop in the shower.
My body yearns with the need for a release. It becomes impossible for me to ignore my aching cock. Seeing Salem again has awakened desires in me I long thought dormant. Gripping the base, I stroke up and down, rolling my wrist around the tip.
I don抰 mean to, but I can抰 help it when I picture Salem in my mind.
It抯 always her. Even when it shouldn抰 have been. Even when I broke us.
My release comes fast and hard. When it抯 over, I lean against the shower wall.
I finish washing up and get dressed for work. Tugging the Holmes Landscaping shirt down over my torso, I reach for my cap and sunglasses.
The very same pair of sunglasses Salem bought me.
They抮e loose and beat up, I need a new pair, but I refuse to part with these. I guess I抦 a sentimental fool like that.
Lacing up my boots, I head downstairs and scarf down a bowl of cereal. It抯 not the healthiest breakfast梕specially with my choice of sugary cereal in the form of Fruity Pebbles梑ut it抣l have to do. I don抰 have the time for anything else this morning.
Normally, I抎 head out to my greenhouse before leaving, but thanks to my extra time in my shower I can抰 afford to spare time for that either.
Quickly rinsing my bowl, I swipe my keys from the counter and head out to my truck.
Before I can back out of the driveway, a phone call comes through the speakers. Laith抯 name flashes across the large display.
I don抰 really feel like talking to my brother right now, but I have a forty-five minute drive to the site so I might as well get this over with.
Pushing the button on my steering wheel to answer his call, I greet him with a simple, 揌ey.?
揂re you sober??He laughs after he asks it.
It抯 his standard greeting.