A book sat on my desk, a mafia romance I had bought last year and hadn抰 got around to reading. For now, I didn抰 want to be Hannah or whatever was left of me. I wanted to be someone else, so I laid down on my bed, cracked the book open, and disappeared.
揇oes the salmon taste okay??
I looked up from my book and nodded at my dad across the table. 揧ep. It抯 great.?I forked another bite into my mouth and returned to my book.
I had read the same page about eight times. I shifted in my chair and shot a glance around the tiny kitchen. The room felt too small. The walls closed in on me. If I lifted my hand, the ceiling would be right above my head. We were going to run out of air soon.
I couldn抰 keep going like this. I couldn抰 slip back into my old life, working in the bookstore for my father, under his thumb, by his rules. I couldn抰 go back to being shy, quiet Hannah who stared out the window, watched the world go by, and wished she could be a part of it. Now that I had a taste of the gold sequinned dress, I couldn抰 go back to hiding it under the bed. Or tucking it under the bed and hiding from it.
揥yatt Rhodes was in the store the other day.?
My heart lifted along with my head. 揌e was??My fork clattered to my plate. He had come looking for me.
I didn抰 know what the solution would be. I didn抰 want Wyatt to stay, that would mean giving up on his dream. That didn抰 sit right with me.
But maybe he had thought of something. Maybe there was a chance.
My dad nodded. 揌e came in with you.?
Right. Before everything went to complete crap.
揙h.?I sunk and turned back to my book. 揧eah.?
揂re you friends??His tone was light, and I knew he was curious but holding back from making me uncomfortable.
揝omething like that.?
揝omething more??
My chest pinched and my mouth drew down into a frown. I shrugged at my book. 揑 don抰 know. We used to be. Not anymore.?
He made an acknowledging hmm noise and nodded at his plate. I read the page for the ninth time.
He put his cutlery down. 揑 want you to be happy.?
A scoff scraped out of my throat and my eyebrows rose. A prickle of bottled-up rage squeaked through. When he shot me a curious glance, I shook my head. 揂s long as it抯 on your terms, right??
揌mm. The store.?He blinked at his empty plate.
揧eah. The store. I抦 not changing it and I抦 not leaving.?I folded my arms over my chest and set my chin. 揑 love it, and we抮e keeping it the way it is. You lied to me.?
He crossed his arms, mirroring me.
揧ou didn抰 just lie about you and Veena. You told me we couldn抰 change a single thing about the store because of Mom. You made it seem like I was spitting on her grave by putting up wallpaper. You made that store a tomb for her, and the entire time, you were moving on just fine.?
I spat the last words out with fury. My chest was tight and my stomach was in knots. My hands shook with anger. I let out another humorless laugh. 揑 have been so stupid. God.?I sucked in a deep breath. 揥hy do I have to make up for your guilt? Why can抰 I move on from Mom too??
His mouth fell open before he sighed. 揑 went there today.?
I reared back. 揧ou did? When??
揥hen you were having a nap.?He nodded to himself. 揥alked over and took another look. What you did with the store, well, Liya told me everything. She told me how the business was struggling, and she told me you weren抰 paying yourself.?
My eyebrows pinched. 揝he knew that??
揝he told me you built an online presence from nothing, with no help from anyone. She showed me the pictures you took inside the store.?His throat worked. 揂nd of the mural.?He exhaled a long breath and pressed his mouth into a line. 揑t抯 hard to believe the mural is gone.?
We sat in silence for a moment.
揑 don抰 know what else of hers I can cling to,?he said, very quietly, wincing. He shook his head. 揑 don抰 want to forget her.?
揑 don抰 want to forget her, either.?
He crossed his arms and stared out the patio door at the backyard. 揇eep down, I knew Claire wouldn抰 agree with what I was doing, keeping the store the same.?He shrugged. He looked so helpless. So unlike my dad. 揑 didn抰 know what else to do. I still don抰。？
An idea trickled into my head.
He gave me a side-long glance. 揌oney, the store looks really cool. I don抰 want you to quit.?
His use of the word cool made me smile. 揧ou think it抯 cool??
He nodded. 揑 do.?He winced and put his head in his hands. 揟hat carpet was ugly, wasn抰 it??
揟he worst. It was disgusting.?
揑 hope you burned it.?
A laugh burst out of my chest. It sounded rusty. 揑 threw it in the dumpster and gave it the middle finger.?
His chest shook and he laughed with me. Our gazes met and something settled in my chest.